


The Steps in Finding Love

by thestorytellerofkpop



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Drama, Drunkenness, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Jeon Jungkook is a Sweetheart, Kim Taehyung is the bi friend everyone needs, Light Angst, M/M, Multi, Originally Posted on Tumblr, POV Female Character, POV Second Person, Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook are married, Reader-Insert, Slice of Life, Smoking, a supportive yet sassy maknae line, bad makeup names and references, jikook - Freeform, realistic fiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-08-10
Packaged: 2020-07-27 06:51:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20041720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thestorytellerofkpop/pseuds/thestorytellerofkpop
Summary: “Mama always told me that you had to go through four steps to get the love you truly deserve. The first step always scared me most, and that step, waspain.The next step was always the worse for the women in our family, and that step, waspatience.The third step to finding love wastrust, and I didn’t know what that truly meant until I got to experience it again. And finally, Mama said, after the trials and tribulations you get the better things in life. Which brings us to the final step, and that, islove.”





	1. Pain

**Author's Note:**

> Pairings: BTS members x Female Reader, Jeon Jungkook x Park Jimin (Jikook)
> 
> Genre: Realistic fiction, slice of life, drama, fluff with eventual smut
> 
> Warnings: Drunken mannerisms, slight nsfw, member x member established relationship, badly made up makeup names and references, slight angst

You had first met Kim Seokjin a little over three years ago, at a nightclub a couple miles away from a hotel you and your work associate were staying at. You arrived in the bustling streets of Dubai earlier that evening, completely intending on relaxing and getting a good nights rest for the conference you would be attending the next morning. But after the whining and persistence that your friend (and business partner) Taehyung berated on you, you figured going out for a drink or two couldn’t be such a bad idea.

But now here you were, three shots of Cuervo later, giggling and hanging off Taehyung’s arm as he dragged you out to the dance floor. The flashing lights hurt your eyes and you were grateful that Taehyung’s height shielded you from the bright bursts of red and blue. You allowed him to drape his arms around your waist as you danced with him, the two of you bursting into fits of giggles when you both tried to be intentionally provocative. Taehyung nudged his nose with yours before leaning down to yell into your ear.

“You got a suitor looking over at you, Y/N.”

“Is that so? Is he my type Taehyungie?” you yelled back over the loud bass. 

“Take a look for yourself.” Taehyung smirked, spinning you around in his hold so your back was pressed up against his chest. You let out a soft gasp at the intense stare you met, leaning your head back against Taehyung’s shoulder to yell back at him.

“Do you mean the extremely attractive man in the suit with the smoldering stare?”

“The one and only, he’s had his eyes on you all night babe.”

“And how do you know he’s not looking at you? You look like sin tonight.” you smirked against his neck, placing a gentle peck against Taehyung’s sweaty and supple skin. Taehyung being attractive was just another fact of the world, just like how the sky was blue. But tonight, your friend was even more attractive than usual, dressed in tight black leather pants and a loose fitting button up. You couldn’t help but allow yourself a little taste of him in your drunken state. Taehyung just chuckled.

“I have my boys back at home, if you’ve forgotten. And besides, I can tell by the look in his eyes he wants you, not me.”

You looked back over at the man and sure enough, his gaze hasn’t lingered from your form. His dark eyes seemed to pierce through your soul, and you watched as he took a sip of his drink, catching sight of a pink tongue licking at the excess drops on his plush lips. Oh, you wanted nothing more than to bite at that soft looking flesh. You watched as his eyes raked your body, taking in the bare skin of your legs and how every shift of your tight red dress exposed more and more skin to his wandering stare.

Taehyung brought you back to your senses when he squeezed your hips, whispering a hasty “Go get ‘em tiger.” into your ear before he pushed you towards the man, giving you a playful slap on your ass before disappearing into the throng of moving bodies around you. 

You mentally cursed at Taehyung for ditching you, and before you could try to turn around and find him, the man was approaching you with an award-winning smile.

“Hey,” he greeted, and oh no he was more handsome up close. His suit hugged him in all the right places and you couldn’t help but wonder what he looked like underneath.

“Hi,” you breathed, not caring to stop your ogling at the fine man in front of you.

“May I buy you a drink?” he asked, his voice taking on a flirtatious lilt.

“Oh, I really shouldn’t-”

“Please, I insist.” he took your hand, leading you over to the bar and offering his seat to you. You took it graciously, just now noting how your feet were hurting in the heels you wore. The man stood closely beside you, one of his hands resting on the small of your back as the bartender approached you two, asking for your order.

“I’ll have a Mai Tai.” you told him, looking at the man next to you to make sure it really was okay. He gave you a disarming smile before ordering a Jack and Coke for himself. 

“Excuse me for being forward, but you’re really beautiful. I’m sure that boyfriend of yours is a lucky guy.” 

“Boyfriend?” you questioned, pausing to think before you smiled. “Who? Tae? Nah, he’s just a friend.” you watched as the stranger’s eyebrows rose, a smirk lining his lips as he moved closer until your shoulders were touching.

“Just a friend, huh?” the man asked as the bartender dropped off your drinks. “So he wouldn’t mind me being close to you like this?”

You shook your head no as you picked up your drink, allowing the fruity flavor to coat your tongue as you chugged half the drink down in your nerves. The stranger chuckled at your eagerness, leaning in to whisper into your ear.

“So he wouldn’t mind if I did this either?”

You felt his warm lips on your neck before you could process what was going on, leaning into his touch with a soft moan. You felt him chuckle against your skin as his lips moved against you, leaving soft kisses behind in his wake. You felt his lips move up to your cheeks then back over to your ear, gently nibbling against lobe before running his tongue over the outer shell, making you shiver in anticipation.

“What’s your name?” he whispered, his breath hot against your skin.

“Y/N.” you breathed.

“And where are you staying tonight, Miss Y/N?”

“I-um.” you lost your train of thought when the hand on your back traveled lower, kneading and grabbing at the soft flesh of your ass. His lips moved back to your neck, nibbling and biting on the skin until you whimpered softly, crossing your legs to stop yourself from getting too hot and bothered. But this stranger was having none of it. With his free hand he gently coaxed your legs apart, letting the tips of his fingers run along the exposed skin of your thigh. His fingers moved underneath the fabric, gently toying with the hem of your panties as your breath came out in soft pants. Never had you been touched so directly in a public place, and you didn’t realize how much you’d enjoy it being done by a stranger none-the-less. 

“Let me know if you want me to stop.” he told you, his fingers gently skimming over your covered slit. When you didn’t tell him no he allowed himself to move your underwear aside, groaning softly when he felt you bare against his fingers.

“You’re so wet, holy shit.” he moaned into your ear. “Where are you staying?”

“T-The Five! I’m staying at The Five.” you all but moaned out.

“What a coincidence, so am I.” he chuckled, relishing in your whine when he removed his hand from your panties. His eyes grew dark when he took in your facial expression, gently grabbing your chin to force you to look up at him until your lips were barely brushing against each other.

“You look so debauched babe, and just with my fingers too. Imagine how you’d act with my tongue, with my cock.” his words had you groaning, closing the distance between your lips to bring him into a searing kiss. The stranger relished in your touch, his lips moving fervently against yours.

“Come back to mine?”

You nodded against his lips, allowing him to drag you out of the club as he led you to a sleek silver Mercedes. You remember the drive and the stranger feeling you up against the smooth leather of the seats. You remember getting into the elevator of your shared hotel and making out against the pristine mirrors. You remember feverish hands removing your clothes and laying you down against the softest bed in the universe. But after that, your memory went black.

~*~

The first thing you noticed when you woke up was the blaring sound of your alarm from your phone. The second thing was the pounding headache you had. And the third was that you were completely and utterly naked against the soft bedsheets. You stood, moving to find your purse and shut off the annoying alarm, shivering at the cool air against your skin. When you turned back to see that you were not in your hotel room and that there was someone else in your bed you froze. The memories came flooding back in waves and you stared in horror at your reflection in one of the many mirrors in the room and saw black and blue bruises lining your collarbone and your thighs. 

You had sex last night. With an extremely attractive man at that. Panic flooded in your veins as you quickly dressed yourself, making sure to stay extra quiet so the man in bed wouldn’t wake up. You needed to talk to someone about this. You had just got fucking laid for the first time since…_him_. The panic quickly shifted into something warm that you’d consider to be excitement. 

After you toed on your shoes, you took one last look at the man sleeping peacefully in the bed. He really was painfully handsome; his facial features sharp and defined in the low light. You briefly considered leaving him a note and your number, but then decided it wouldn’t be worth it after a one night stand. Besides, you didn’t want to seem desperate or clingy. When you pulled out your phone to check the time you cursed softly. Your conference was in forty-five minutes, and you needed to get your shit together.

Once you left the room you pressed your phone to your ear as you ran towards the elevator, quickly hopping on and pressing the button to your floor as your phone rang. After the third ring the person on the other line picked up.

“Hello?”

“Jimin! I’m sorry for bothering you on your honeymoon with Kookie, but-”

“Babe?” you heard Jungkook’s voice on the other line, followed by embarrassingly sweet kissing noises. “Our dinner reservation is in half an hour, we should head out.”

“We’ll leave in a second, I’m talking to Y/N on the phone.”

“Y/N?!” you could hear Jungkook’s smile through the phone. “Girl, how’s Dubai?! Is it as pretty as everyone says it is?” you laughed at your friend’s obvious excitement, his child-like joy was contagious and you couldn’t help but smile as the elevator doors opened and you rushed towards your room.

“It’s beautiful, and the men here are even prettier.” you admitted softly, opening your door and rushing inside as you transpired to the two men what happened last night.

“Shut up! You got laid?!” Jimin yelled through the phone and you laughed, telling him that yes, you did in fact have sex with one of the most handsome men you had seen in your life.

“You get it Y/N! I’m so proud of you.” Jimin gushed.

“But it’s so early over there Y/N, isn’t the conference this morning?” Jungkook asked as you put the phone on speaker as you changed your clothes.

“Yes, that’s why I’m rushing to make it there before I’m late. Mr. Sexy kinda distracted me this morning.” you said as you pulled on an appropriate business suit.

“You didn’t get his name?” Jimin questioned.

“Hey, I think Mr. Sexy works just fine,” Jungkook chuckled, “Besides, he was just a one night stand anyways.”

“Exactly. He was fun for the night, and I’m probably never going to see him again.” you said, disappointment laced in your voice. 

“You didn’t leave him a number or anything?!” Jimin practically screamed through the phone. “Y/N, Dubai is full of business people. You can never know if he’s closer to home than you think. And no offense honey, but you need to find yourself a permanent dick.”

“Offense taken.” you grumbled as you put your hair up into a bun. You moved to clean up your makeup and reapply it as Jungkook playfully teased Jimin for offending you. You sighed at how easily the two flirted with each other, and while you were extremely happy for them, you couldn’t help but wish for someone to love you in the way your two friends loved each other.

“Let the girl live her life Jiminie, no need to go all mother hen on her.” Jungkook told his husband and you could hear Jimin sigh through the phone.

“I only say it because I care about you Y/N, I know loneliness can be tough.”

“And I appreciate it Jimin,” you told him sincerely, toeing on your heels and grabbing your briefcase, quickly putting the phone back on privacy mode before hurrying down to the conference room of the hotel. “Really, I do. But we have our business to worry about right now. You two, me, Taehyung, and our business together is my main concern. I don’t have time for a serious relationship right now. And Mr. Sexy probably doesn’t have time either.” you added with a chuckle. Jimin and Jungkook both laughed and you smiled.

“I have to go find Taehyung, have fun in Hawaii and enjoy your dinner.”

“Alright Y/N, we’ll be back soon enough.” Jungkook assured you through the phone.

“We both love you, make our business proud!” Jimin blew you a kiss before hanging up and you sighed as you looked down at your phone. You frowned as you thought about Jimin’s words, making your way into the conference room that was buzzing with scattered conversation. Taehyung saw you first, running up to you with a smile plastered on his face. His smile slid though when he saw your frown, grabbing your free hand out of concern.

“You okay Y/N? You look sadder than I thought you’d be this morning.” Taehyung admitted as he led you to your seats.

“‘M fine.” you allowed, placing your briefcase on the table as you took out your notes and itinerary. You took out your reading glasses as well, pushing them up your nose as you straightened your papers.

“Just fine?” Taehyung pressed on, his brown hair falling into his eyes as he watched you intently. “I saw you leave with that man last night.” you pursed your lips and turned to Taehyung.

“Yeah, thanks for ditching me by the way.” you steered the conversation away from the man and rather onto Taehyung instead.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Berate me later. But did my plan work? Did you have sex with him?” Taehyung asked.

“What is with you boys and me having sex? Jimin and Jungkook were over-the-moon when I told them this morning and now you too? Do I really seem that desperate to you guys?” you asked.

“Well duh,” Taehyung admitted with a chuckle. “We haven’t seen you have a proper relationship, or proper fucking for that matter, since the summer before college. I thought you’d be happy having that fine piece of man all to yourself for a night.” you sighed, playing with your fingers as you looked for the right words to say.

“I was happy Tae,” you started, rolling your eyes at Taehyung’s triumphant ‘yes’. “But like you said, it was just for a night. He’s not a permanent deal. We have a business to raise, and like I told the newlyweds, that’s all I care about. My friends and our business. I don’t have time for relationships. I’m alone and I’m happy with that.” you sighed, your heart wringing in pain from the loneliness you felt surge through your body.

“Well you don’t sound happy.” Taehyung sighed, pulling you in for a hug. You graciously returned it, burying your face into his neck as you relaxed in his hold. “I’m sorry if I made you upset.”

“Oh Tae,” you pecked his cheek, mustering up a smile for him. “You have nothing to apologize for. My actions are my actions and I have to live with them.”

“Yeah but I hate seeing you all bummed out. We all do. I can’t begin to tell you how many conversations I’ve had with Jimin and Jungkook with just us worrying about you and how lonely you are.” Taehyung stared at you intently and his strong gaze made you turn away from him.

“I’m fine. I promise. I’ll get in a relationship when all of this mess is sorted out first.” you gestured to the conference with a flourish of your hands. “Once our business reaches the heights of the big-wigs I promise you I’ll start to focus on me, myself and I. Okay?”

“Promise?” Taehyung held out his pinky, making you giggle at the way you and him used to make promises since middle school.

“Pinky promise.” you confirmed, wrapping your pinky around his own. 

It was at that time the conference began, everyone rushing to their seats at the sound of the hosts voice over the intercom. You adjusted the glasses on your face as the introductions were made, idly looking at the handouts that were being passed around the room. Taehyung was practically bursting with excitement, his notepad out and ready for any spontaneous ideas that would burst from his mind from the presenters at the conference. 

You really had nothing to focus on: rather than marketing and operation tactics which you specialized in, this conference was more for the creative visionaries, focusing on trends and new product releases rather than actual business practices. And Taehyung being your main product designer was focusing intently on every word that was spoken, occasionally scribbling ideas down as time dragged on. Jungkook and Jimin had more creative visionary than you, but you did jot down a few ideas to present to all three boys once you all returned to Seoul.

“Y/N, Y/N! Kim Seokjin is up next! This is the first time he’s ever shown his face to the public eye after three years of success! Aren’t you excited?!” Taehyung whispered to you as you politely clapped for the presenter leaving the stage. Clearly everyone else was just as excited, a soft hum of excitement vibrating throughout the large meeting room. But you didn’t want to damper Taehyung’s mood, so you smiled and nodded.

“Yeah, sure Tae.”

You clapped with everyone else as Kim Seokjin made his way on stage, but you gasped when you saw his face.

“Y/N, isn’t that-”

“Uh-huh.” you told Taehyung, nodding at him in shock. Kim Seokjin, one of the most successful and influential people in the makeup business, was the man you had woken up beside that morning. And when you locked eyes with him halfway through the middle of his presentation, you knew that at the after party later tonight you would be royally fucked.

~*~

You and Taehyung had always dreamt of owning your own makeup company, ever since middle school. After all, with his creativity and his knack for makeup and your dreams of being a successful businesswoman, you both started your ambitions early on. Once you met Jimin and Jungkook in college though, did you start getting serious. Jimin and Jungkook both shared Taehyung’s passion for makeup and you all got along swimmingly, and it wasn’t until one drunken night after finals when you proposed to the couple that they join your endeavors in starting a company. 

Surprisingly they agreed, and after graduation you and the boys invested in the world of cosmetology; quickly earning degrees in the subject to familiarize yourselves with the ins and outs of makeup and all of its tricks of the trade. After that year was over with, you all had bought a small workshop to experiment and work in, which eventually led to the small warehouse you and the boys now had today. And in a little less than two years you had a team of thirty employees under you: a few were apart of Jimin’s media team and a few more handled the finances with Jungkook. Taehyung’s division of “makeup scientists” as he called them, helped him make and produce the actual makeup and the rest belonged to you: the marketing strategists, the ones that packaged and handled makeup shipments and everyone else in between.

But you were far from done growing. You were still small and barely scraping by with your local distributors in Seoul. You needed real, major dealers and PR. And you needed them fast. Which is why Taehyung encouraged you to come to the conference in the first place. To find distributors at this after party and not be hiding from the ridiculously handsome influencer, Kim Seokjin, like you were doing now. 

Taehyung had ditched you long ago to share ideas with the other visionaries, leaving you to hide in a secluded corner by the bar, away from the public eye. You had slept with Kim Seokjin. The man that could buy out your business with a snap of his fingers. You were mortified, and humiliated and you don’t think you could show your face at any major event ever-

“Y/N?” you froze, your hand tightening around the glass of champagne you held.

“Shit,” you cursed, smiling sheepishly at Seokjin who had found you in the corner. “Hi.” you said shyly.

“Hey,” he smiled, sliding into your little private corner of the party. “You left really early this morning. I was hoping for some morning cuddles.” he teased lightly, sipping on his own champagne. You flushed at his words, avoiding his gaze.

“I had to be at the conference earlier than you did. You didn’t come on until halfway through so you had more time to lie in.”

“Very true, but you didn’t even leave me a number Y/N. I was heart broken.”

“Well, Mr. Kim-”

“Please, just Seokjin.” he corrected and you sighed.

“Seokjin then. I didn’t think I’d be seeing you again, and I was under the impression that what we had was just for last night.”

“On the contrary,” Seokjin paused, looking you up and down. “I wanted to keep in touch.” You flushed under his gaze and Seokjin chuckled at how cute you were.

“So, I didn’t take you as the type to be in makeup manufacturing, and yet here you are to my luck. The gods were certainly on my side when I asked them to see you again.” Seokjin smirked, watching you try to find your words.

“Oh I’m just in charge of marketing and operations for our business. All the inside stuff,” you chuckled nervously. “My partner Taehyung does most of the manufacturing and creative thinking work, so this conference was mainly for him. Without him and his passion for makeup, I wouldn’t be here or have a job. I’m here to support him and gain intel on the distributors in the market.” you rambled, but how could you not when you were proud of your little team for how far you’ve come by yourselves. 

“You need distributors?” he asked and you nodded.

“What’s your company name?” Seokjin asked, looking at you inquisitively as he sipped his champagne.

“BeauV Cosmetics.” you said proudly.

“And what kind of products do you have out now?”

“Well. We have our V line that’s out and that includes two eyeshadow palettes: Tear which is nudes, and Wing which has numerous bright shades. The V line also has a few different eyeliners and mascaras. We’ve sold about 200 units of both eyeshadows and 300 of eyeliner and mascara combined. In testing we have our PJM and JJK lines, and those are highlighters, blush, and two more eyeshadows: The Angel and Devil palettes. All of them are made by our team at our headquarters in Seoul and are vegan and cruelty free.” you rattled off mechanically, having been through your normal spiel too many times to count. 

Seokjin nodded thoughtfully, tilting his head in thought as you bit your lip nervously.

“What about developing ideas? Just to get a feel for what may come in the future?”

“Oh, that would be a question for Taehyung. I could find him and bring him over to talk if you’d like?” you were about to turn to find your partner when Seokjin grabbed your hand, bringing your focus back on him.

“I want to hear your ideas Y/N.” he smiled gently at you and you blushed under his gaze.

“N-No, I’m not the creative type. My ideas probably aren’t good enough.” you chuckled at yourself. Seokjin brought your hand up to his lips, his plush lips kissing your knuckles gently.

“Try me, babe.”

“Well…I had this thought just today,” you admitted, pulling out the notes you wrote from earlier.

“I was thinking of doing a food inspired palette. I wanted to pitch an idea called ‘Cake’ because who doesn’t love cake, y’know? Half the shades could be inspired by the different flavors of cake and the other half on different frostings. Like, I really want to do a yellow shade that can be called ‘Lemon curd’ and a deep violet that could be ‘Mixed berry’ because those colors are hard to do well and keep the pigment in without having a lot of fall-off product. So that alone would make us stand out in the market. I know those shades are hard but I’m sure we could do it with our company’s formula, after all ‘Suck, bang, blow’ in the Devil palette is the best red I’ve used in years and-” you paused when you noticed Seokjin’s amused smile, flushing under his stare. You hastily apologized, grabbing your glass of champagne and taking a sip to distract yourself from the embarrassment that was brewing in your tummy.

“You don’t need to apologize Y/N. I find your rambling to be extremely endearing.” Seokjin gave you another one of his disarming smiles and you felt the breath whoosh out of you. 

“I like your ideas and the sound of your products, and I think my distributors would too. They’re the best in the business. I think you should call them up, tell them I sent you.” Seokjin handed you a few business cards and you stared at him with your mouth agape.

“Seokjin, I-”

“Now there’s no need to thank me,” Seokjin smirked, pulling out a gold pen from the pocket of his jacket and another card. He scribbled something onto the card and handed it to you. “But a call or even a text would be nice. I travel a lot but I do have a home in Seoul, and I’d love to see you again.”

Seokjin chuckled at your blush, and that chuckle turned into a full-blown laugh after he kissed your cheek, watching you sputter incoherently.

“You do realize we did worse than that last night, right?”

“Oh, please don’t remind me. I’m absolutely mortified.” you admitted, hiding your face behind your hands. Seokjin gently guided your hands away from your face, a small frown pulling his plush lips down. 

“Did you not enjoy yourself?” he asked softly, his voice laced with hurt.

“No! No, that’s not it-”

“Then why are you mortified by the fact you had sex with me?” his gaze held many unspoken emotions and you felt your heart crumble in your chest.

“Because you’re. You!” you gestured at all of him, “You’re Kim Seokjin, one of the biggest names in makeup and one of the most influential men in the industry. And I’m just me.” Seokjin frowned at your words.

“I wouldn’t have you any other way though,” Seokjin admitted, and you stared at him in shock. “You’re unbearably attractive. Not only that, but you have drive, passion for the industry, there’s no doubt you’ll go far. So please, call me? I’d really like your company Y/N.” Seokjin gave you one parting smile before leaving you alone to reel over his words and the little cards he left for you.

~*~

Five months after the conference is when you saw Kim Seokjin again.

After he gave you his contacts at the party, you ran up to Taehyung with the brightest smile he had seen you have in years as you rambled about the new prospects your business could have. And once Jimin and Jungkook returned home from their honeymoon, the four of you were suddenly launched into business meetings and large exponential growth. The PR Jimin had developed from the local businesses and your marketing team, mixed with the advertisements from your new distributor, Xorphie, brought your sales up 300% and the V line was suddenly flying off the shelves in Xorphie stores and Olta stores around the world. The consumer base loved not only the makeup, but the people behind the line as well. Jimin made sure your four faces were known to the fan-following you had gathered, and when you finally launched the PJM and JJK lines, your team couldn’t keep up with production, forcing you to employ another work force and buy another warehouse to keep up with the influx of orders you received.

Yes, BeauV cosmetics was finally kicking off, all thanks to Kim Seokjin.

As you were working on your pitch for the ‘Cake’ palette one quiet evening, your phone chimed with the sound of a text message. You huffed, putting down your pencils in annoyance at your work being interrupted. But your annoyance quickly turned into shock when you saw it was Seokjin reaching out to you. You smiled, giggling like a heart-stricken teen upon seeing his name. 

You upheld Seokjin’s wishes and kept in touch with the incredibly attractive man after the conference. Texts turned to calls, which turned into you talking with the man for hours into the night, which led to his confession of love spoken through the phone at 3 am one Wednesday morning. In the throughs of passion, you admitted your attraction for the man as well, which finally brought you into the secret relationship you’ve been in with Kim Seokjin for the past two months. Your three friends knew of course (Jimin screamed when he found out, him and Taehyung glomping you in hugs as Jungkook patted your head in accomplishment for finally finding someone to love) and Seokjin told you he told his brother, Minhyuk, about you as well. But other than that your relationship was kept quiet in the public eye, for both of your business and your sanity as well. You didn’t think you could handle the fame and attention you’d get from being “Kim Seokjin’s girlfriend”, you could barely contain your blush when fans stopped you in the street. 

So when you got the text from your boyfriend (you still couldn’t get over calling him that) who was supposed to be in Paris, that he was back and home in Seoul for a couple days, you were more than ecstatic. You quickly threw all your papers into a large bag before grabbing your keys and driving to Seokjin’s apartment.

You still couldn’t get over the lavish lifestyle your boyfriend held. Sure, you were in a comfortable and cozy place, but your building didn’t have a doorman or the shining chandeliers in the lobby like Seokjin’s did. You admired the golden features in the elevator as you rode up to the penthouse suite, scanning your access card as you looked at your reflection in the mirror. Compared to everything else, you seemed very plain in just your old jeans and sweatshirt, but you couldn’t seem to care once the elevator reached the top floor. You quickly ran down the small hallway to Seokjin’s door, knocking on the pristine wood with a smile.

When the door opened you were instantly in Seokjin’s arms and you could hear him laugh into your hair as he held you close. You hugged him back tightly, relishing in his touch.

“Y/N,” Seokjin sighed happily, leaving staccato kisses into your hair as he pulled you into his apartment, carefully shutting the door behind you. “Oh, how I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too Seokjin,” you mumbled into his shirt, “So much.”

“Let me look at you,” Seokjin angled your face up to his, his eyes searching yours. His lips pulled up into a smile and his dark eyes shined beautifully against the light. His thumbs gently stroked your cheeks as you both just took each other in. He had dyed his hair back to black; the last Skype call you had together his hair was fading pink, but that didn’t matter to you. Seokjin could change his hair as many times as he’d like but it wouldn’t change who he was. The man that made you laugh. The man that made you feel special, the man that always listened to your qualms. The man that made you feel love again.

“You’re beautiful. So, so beautiful.” Seokjin praised, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“You’re not so bad yourself Mr. Kim.” you teased, running your fingers through his hair. “I liked the pink, but I think the black gives you charm.”

“Well thank you,” Seokjin smirked. He suddenly picked you up, laughing at your soft squeal as your legs wrapped around his waist and his hands gripped your thighs. You brought your arms around his neck as he walked, giggling when Seokjin peppered your cheeks with kisses. He gently placed you onto the couch, kneeling down in front of you on the floor and taking your hands in his.

“So, I have pizza and imported gin from England if you’d like to eat with me?” he offered.

“That sounds tasty,” you leaned down to nudge your nose against his, “But I’d rather taste you first.”

Seokjin chuckled, leaning up to close the distance between your lips. He felt so soft, so warm against you, gently coaxing you to melt against his frame. It had been too long since the last time you had his lips on yours, and god did he feel heavenly. The long distance was hard, but it was moments like these that made it seem worthwhile. Seokjin pecked your lips once, twice, before parting away from you.

“God, I’ve missed your lips so much.” he admitted, his fingers gently running against the shape of your mouth. “I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve imagined kissing you again.”

“Well aren’t you just a charmer,” you giggled, allowing yourself another peck against his plush lips. “But I believe you promised me pizza?”

Seokjin chuckled, giving you another peck and a soft ‘I’ll be back’ before leaving you alone in his living room. Everything was sleek and modern, with black leather and silver metals and white accents adorning the walls. One wall was made entirely of glass and you admired the city’s skyline shining out into the dark twilight sky.

“Do you take lemon with your gin?” Seokjin asked as he placed the box of pizza on the coffee table, along with the bottle of alcohol and two glasses.

“It’s not required-”

“But would you want it?” Seokjin tilted his head at you. “Nothing’s too big or too little Y/N, if you want something I’ll get it for you.”

You smiled softly, leaning up to place a kiss on his cheek, admitting that yes, some lemon would be nice. As soon as he was gone he was back, placing a lemon slice in your glass and pouring you both drinks. He plopped down on the couch, pulling you into his lap as you juggled your glasses to keep them from spilling. Seokjin rested his head on your shoulder, leaving the occasional kiss on your neck as you turned on the TV and settled back against his chest. For the first time in months you felt truly relaxed, sipping your gin in content as Seokjin showered you in kisses. He was so warm you felt yourself start to doze off, snuggling against his body as he whispered sweet things into your ear.

“Are you asleep?”

“Yes.” you giggled softly.

“Are you cold?” he asked.

“Nope.” you said softly, popping the ‘p’ as you spoke. 

You heard Seokjin shifting next to you, and when his warm arms wrapped around your waist with a blanket you smiled, his warm chest pressing even closer into your back as one of his legs tangled with yours.

“There, now you won’t be cold anymore.” his voice was laced with satisfaction and you rolled your eyes, settling against him.

“I wasn’t cold to begin with, you dork.” Seokjin snickered against your skin, placing gentle kisses into your hair.

“Babe, aren’t you going to eat?” he asked softly, gently placing his empty glass down on the table. You hummed softly, leaning back to look up at his face.

“I will, eventually.” you relented, bringing his head down to give him a kiss. “But I’m happy just being here with you.” Seokjin smiled against your lips, letting you kiss him silly until both your lips were red and swollen.

“Are you gonna at least tell me what’s in that giant bag before we get too serious?” Seokjin teased, gently biting your neck as he gestured to the bag you dropped in his doorway.

“Oh!” you rushed to grab the bag, hearing Seokjin’s signature laugh when you tripped in your haste to return to him. You plopped back down on his lap, pulling out your designs and shadings.

“It’s my pitch for the ‘Cake’ palette we talked about at the conference. We’ve been so busy pushing the V, PJM and JJK lines for the past five months we haven’t had time to sit and talk about future releases. The boys and I are having a meeting tomorrow with our Xorphie manager and pitching all our ideas now, so we have enough time to develop the product and get enough marketing and media coverage done in time for the holiday season! And we can even present our future release at the Xorphie conference in Milan in two months if we hurry! Can you imagine the coverage?!” you jabbered on to Seokjin, who just watched you in amusement as he thumbed through your designs.

“I’ll be at that conference too y’know, hopefully we’ll get to have some fun together then.” Seokjin kissed your cheek. “I really like this shade right here,” Seokjin tapped on the color with his finger.

“Peaches and Cream? Yeah, I like it too. That and Carrot Cake, the natural shades in the palette good for everyday use.” you smiled at your work. “Although y’know I’m fond of Lemon Curd and Mixed Berry.”

“Mmhmm, I know babe.” Seokjin nuzzled his nose against your cheek. “They’ll be beautiful once you get the formula right. You’ll have to let me test it before it gets released to the public.”

“Of course! I’d love nothing more,” you giggled.

“The packaging is really cute, just like you.” Seokjin said, looking at your design more intently.

“I thought the idea of packaging the palette in a cake box was a fun idea. And the palette itself being a beautiful white cake even better.”

“You should add some strawberries on top of the cake design,” Seokjin commented. “I like the candles and the fun-fetti sprinkles around the side of the cake, but it seems to be missing something. I think the splash of red would make the pastel sprinkles stand out nicely.”

“Ooo, that’s an idea.” you mumbled, leaning down to grab your red pencil before shading in a couple strawberry slices on top of the cake design. You felt Seokjin smile into your skin.

“It looks good enough to eat.” he said, leaning down to nibble against your neck. “Just like you, Y/N.”

“Seokjin,” you moaned softly at a particularly hard suck, his tongue laving gently over the skin you knew would turn purple later.

“I haven’t seen you in months, Y/N. I don’t know if I can keep up my self control.”

“Who said you had to?” you smirked. Seokjin chuckled, pulling you up and leading you to his bedroom, giggles falling past your lips even when he shut the door behind you.

~*~

You and your boys arrived a day early in Milan for the Xorphie conference and you couldn’t be more excited.

Since Seokjin left after those three days of bliss, you both had become very distant. Your frequent calls turned into scattered texts as you both became enthralled with work and makeup, you working on the approved Cake palette (which your boys and manager loved, much to your surprise) and Seokjin working on his next big release: the Bloodlust palette. Weeks turned into months and you barely got a good morning, good night, and I love you out of him every day, and normally it was you that had to initiate it first. But now, you were both in the same place. Now your loneliness could be appeased. Even if it was just for two nights. And your plane arrived two hours early, much to your delight.

“Y/N, calm down, you’re practically shaking from excitement.” Taehyung laughed when the Uber finally pulled up to the hotel you and the boys were staying at.

“Oh give her a break Tae,” Jungkook chuckled. “I’d be acting the same way if I hadn’t seen Jiminie for months.” As Jimin cooed at the sweetness of Jungkook’s words, you were practically shoving Taehyung out of the car, urging him to hurry up.

“Y/N, you know what room Seokjin is in right? Why don’t you go on ahead and we’ll text you the room number?” Jimin offered, noticing how your eyes widened at his proposition. 

“A-Are you sure? I mean how will I get in-”

“Don’t worry. Jungkook and I were planning on staying in tonight, isn’t that right honey?” Jimin turned to his husband, linking their arms together once Jungkook finished loading up the luggage rack.

“Huh?” Jungkook looked between the three of you with wide eyes, “What am I agreeing to?”

“Y/N, go.” Taehyung chuckled. “We’ll be in the room just in case you need us, although I assume you’ll be spending the night with Seokjin?”

“That’s the plan,” you winked.

“Well my bed is always open to you if you need it. Now go have fun.” Taehyung smirked, nudging you towards the entrance of the hotel. You practically skipped towards the elevator, hopping on and clicking the button to the 19th floor.

When you stepped off the elevator, you could hear the sounds of muffled screams echoing throughout the hallway. You chuckled softly. Clearly you weren’t the only one that was getting a good fucking tonight. But as you walked further down the hallway, the moaning got louder as you looked for Seokjin’s room. When you finally stood outside the door to his room, the moaning seemed to be at it’s crescendo as you stared blankly at the golden 1985 etched into the white door. You took out your phone, double checking you were at the right room and yes, 1985 was correct room. With bated breath, you pressed your ear to the door, confirming that the noises of pleasure were in fact coming from that room. 

You tried to suppress your rage, after all, Seokjin wouldn’t cheat on you. Not when he knew you were coming, not after being together for four months, no, he was better than that. There was obviously just some mix up in the rooms that’s all. And when you knock on the door and look into the eyes of stranger, you would blush and apologize, saying you got the wrong room before calling Seokjin and he would answer your question with a laugh, saying the hotel screwed up and he was actually in a different room and he didn’t text you until now because he thought you were still on your flight.

You placed three curt knocks against the door and suddenly the moaning stopped. You waited for a minute or two before knocking on the door again, this time louder. You heard shuffling on the other side of the door before it opened in the slightest of cracks; you couldn’t even see into the room.

“Hi, we don’t need cleaning service-”

You grabbed the door, preventing the girl on the other side from hastily shoving it closed in your face. You chuckled, prying open the door slightly to see a busty blonde with smeared makeup on her face.

“Is Kim Seokjin in?” you asked through the gritted teeth of your forced smile. She nodded her head. “Would you mind telling him that his girlfriend is at the door, and that she’s breaking up with him?” the look of shock that passed over her face was priceless and you would’ve laughed if your heart wasn’t shattering into literal pieces at your feet. And with that, you shut the door in her face, allowing the white noise that was filling your ears to consume you as tears fell down your cheeks. You moved to take the walk of shame down the long hallway, barely moving a few feet before someone grabbed at your wrist, halting your movements. You huffed, not even giving him the time to glance back.

“Seokjin, let go of me.”

“Please, Y/N, let me explain-”

“I think you made your point loud and clear Kim Seokjin. Clearly you don’t love me if you have to get your pleasure from other women. Now. Let. Go.” you said through your tears.

“Y/N-”

“Let go, before I seriously hurt you.”

“But-”

“If I have to tell you one more time-”

“Would you just listen-”

The slap you placed on his cheek with your free hand cracked throughout the hall like a whip. Seokjin was taken aback, his mouth dropped in shock as the red imprint of your hand started to creep up on your cheek.

“Let go.” you repeated. When Seokjin didn’t you raised your hand up again, ready to punch him this time when-

“Hey!” you both looked up to see your three partners in the hallway, Taehyung and Jimin staring at you in shock as Jungkook bounded towards you, his face positively livid. “The lady told you to let go of her. And trust me when I say this is your only warning from me before I’ll punch your face in.”

You shook your wrist free, turning back to stare at Seokjin. He wasn’t crying like you were, his eyes weren’t even red with tears. Rather, he looked quite stupid, standing in the middle of the hallway as his eyes darted between you and Jungkook. And his cock was still half-hard, how classy.

“We’re done Kim Seokjin.” you told him, spinning on your heel to go to Jimin and Taehyung.

“I don’t know what you did to Y/N, but heed my advice buddy,” Jungkook spat with venom in his voice. “If you touch her, speak to her, or hell even look at her at all tomorrow, you won’t be able to walk anymore.” Jungkook could be intimidating when he wanted to be, and right now, with his eyes blazing and his arms flexing beneath his black tee, you could tell Seokjin was terrified of the younger man.

“Jungkook, he’s not worth it. C’mon.” you tugged on his arm, pulling him along with you. Jungkook wrapped an arm around your shoulder possessively, shooting a glare at Seokjin as you both walked to the other guys. You were only about 20 feet away from Seokjin’s room when you stopped in front of Jimin and Taehyung.

“Is this our room?” you asked quietly. Jimin nodded, quickly opening the door to allow you and Jungkook to enter, followed by himself and Taehyung with the luggage. Once the door shut you let out a shuttering sob, instantly turning towards Taehyung to cry into his shoulder

“Oh Tae, your shirt-”

Taehyung gave Jimin a pointed glare, making the eldest shut up as you continued to cry. Taehyung instinctively held you tighter, one of his hands weaving into your hair as he whispered words of comfort into your ears.

“I’m so stupid Tae, so stupid for thinking that he loved me.” you cried. “But he was sleeping with another women, and who knows how many other times he’s done the same thing.”

“Babe…I’m so sorry.” he whispered. Suddenly, you felt two more pairs of arms wrap around you, and all four of you stood in the middle of the hotel room as you hugged and cried until the tears dried up. With a sniffle, you allowed Taehyung to wipe away the mascara running down your face.

“I’m sorry about your shirt.” you croaked, looking at the white silk tainted with streaks of black mascara. 

“What, this old thing?” Taehyung chuckled, brushing off the fact that the shirt was from Louis Vuitton and not that old at all. “You’re more important than any old shirt.”

“Y/N,” Jimin stole your attention away to place a kiss on your cheek. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that this had to happen to you.”

“Jimin and I were going to bring some food back, do you want anything special?” Jungkook asked. You shook your head, and with a ruffle of your hair the two boys left you with Taehyung. You both were quiet for a beat before Taehyung opened his mouth.

“So I guess you’re sleeping with me tonight, huh?” Taehyung wiggled his eyebrows and despite everything, you managed to let out a watery giggle. You nodded, wiping your eyes with a balled up fist.

“C’mere, you need some comfy clothes.” Taehyung said, throwing you a pair of sweats and a white t-shirt. You began to strip into Taehyung’s clothes, the two of you being close for so long you didn’t care that you were exposing yourself to him. His clothes smelt like his cologne and the scent instantly relaxed you as you threw yourself onto the closest bed with a loud thump. Taehyung chuckled, laying down beside you on the bed as his hand rubbed comforting circles into your back.

“This hurts Tae,” you admitted, turning to face him with a new set of tears in your eyes. “It feels like my heart is being stabbed with every breath I take.”

Taehyung frowned, tentatively running his fingers through your hair. He opened his arms up to you wordlessly and you took the invitation to let him hold you as you cried again. He sighed into your hair as you sobbed, occasionally giving your forehead reassuring kisses.

“Well, you know what my mom used to say to me?” Taehyung spoke after you dried your eyes. A wave of exhaustion washed over you, and you knew you wouldn’t stay awake long enough to eat whatever Jimin and Jungkook brought back for you. You hummed as you closed your eyes, settling against Taehyung as his thumbs traced the trails of tears on your cheeks.

“Pain makes you stronger, tears make you braver, and heartbreak makes you wiser. You’ll get through this sweetheart, I promise.”


	2. Patience

Tonight was the night. Tonight was the launch of the Cake palette you and your team worked tirelessly for, for months. You worked through the pain of your breakup until you passed out from exhaustion, filling the painful and broken void of your heart with the struggles and stress of work. You worked yourself to the bone up until tonight, making sure everything was in place for the party and informing security that Kim Seokjin was removed from the guest list and shouldn’t be allowed entry under any circumstances. Eventually Taehyung’s words started to make sense to you: you felt enlightened now that you’ve experienced a real heartbreak. The amount of tears that you cried grew less and less with each passing hour and day of work until you couldn’t come up with a logical reason to cry anymore. And the pain? Well, most of it was gone. But then again, no one ever really gets over the pain of their first real heartbreak, do they? Now here you were with your three friends in Jimin’s and Jungkook’s apartment, getting ready for the night of celebration.

“Babe, you need to chill.” Taehyung pursed his lips at you, bopping the eyeshadow brush he held against your nose. “I’m gonna ruin your makeup if you keep shaking like that.”

“Sorry Tae,” you said absentmindedly, playing with the hem of your bright turquoise dress. “I’m just nervous.”

“About the party or about you-know-who?” Jungkook asked from across the room, carefully applying Jimin’s eyeliner. He smiled and clicked his tongue when he was done, holding up a mirror to show Jimin his work.

“Beautiful as always Kookie.” Jimin smiled, straightening out his husband’s tie before moving to sit next to you. 

He held your hand, and the warm gesture made you relax enough to allow Taehyung to finish applying your bright white eyeshadow, the shade you dubbed ‘Bavarian Cream’.

“Y/N. It’s been three months honey. If Seokjin was going to try something he would’ve done it by now.” Jimin tried to calm your nerves.

“Yeah, I’m surprised he didn’t pull our distributor out from under us.” Jungkook chuckled, touching up his smoky eye look.

“Seokjin may be a jerk, but he isn’t as low as to destroy our business. He believed in us, believed in me.” you felt tears well-up in your eyes from the fond recollection and before they could fall Jimin and Taehyung were on you in an instant.

“Nuh-uh babe, no tears tonight. This is a happy night! And if you cry you’re gonna ruin your look.” Taehyung fussed, placing a tissue under your eyes to catch the stray tears.

“Oh honey. You’re too good for that asshole. I know you loved him, but you’re so much better than he is.” Jimin kissed your knuckles in reassurance. “Prove that bitch wrong, Y/N. When he sees pictures of tonight’s launch he’s going to be wishing he never cheated on you.” you laughed at Jimin’s exuberance, nodding your head at him. 

“You’re a motherfucking woman, you don’t need an ass like Kim Seokjin to make you happy! He’s not worth your tears or your time. He’s just a scrub compared to you; a self-made, independent business woman who don’t need no man.” Jimin snapped his fingers at you, making a new wave of giggles expel from your lips. 

“You’re right Jiminie. I’m gonna prove him wrong.” you spoke with a newfound confidence the boys haven’t heard you have since the breakup, and they all smiled at each other. 

“That’s my girl.” Jimin squeezed you hand in determination. “Now, let Tae finish you up so we can leave and celebrate!” Jimin cheered, allowing his husband to place a kiss on his colored lips. You smiled at the boys, turning back to Taehyung with confidence in your eyes.

“Make me look like a bad bitch, Tae.” he giggled at your words, giving you a boxy grin.

“That’s what I’ve been trying to do girl!”

You chuckled as Taehyung finished up your eyes, and you made funny faces at him when he put on your highlighter and blush (”Only the best of the V line for you, my dear”). You looked at each of your boys and pride swelled in your chest at how far you all have come. They all looked radiant.

Jungkook was the simplest of the group; his brown hair was quaffed and his foundation was basic, but his eyes were dark and smoky with underlying sins and promises, and his suit was form fitting with a black tie to match. Jimin was pristine. His eyes were in the deep matte purple of the famous ‘Mixed Berry’ color from Cake, his eyeliner was a rich blue that came from his own collection and his mouth held a nude lip color that he was touching up from the kiss he shared. He wore all white, drawing more attention to his eyes and freshly bleached-blonde hair. And Taehyung? He was absolutely gorgeous. His eyes reflected that of a sunset: the reds, oranges, and yellows from all your palettes blended in to create a cacophony of color that matched beautifully with his red hair. His full bodysuit was red as well, and even though it was a women’s cut, Taehyung’s curves and ass filled it out perfectly. His custom made six-inch heels from Gucci were drool-worthy, made with red velvet material so that he “Could walk the red carpet all the time”. His lips were thick and blood red from Jungkook’s Devil line, and you prayed for Taehyung’s boys for when he returns home that night, because god damn if you didn’t jump your friend, you knew his boys would.

“And…there! The most beautiful one of us all, is complete.” Taehyung flourished, turning you around to meet the gaze of Jimin and Jungkook. 

Your eyes were white with glitter and a sparkling liner to boot, shining wonderfully against your bright turquoise dress. The dress was low cut, revealing the skin of your chest and thighs in the most seductive way. Your lashes were long and luscious and your cheeks glowed under the lights of the apartment. Your lips looked divine, the tint of pink Taehyung applied made your lips look natural, yet enticing to the eye. And when you stood and toed on your sparkling Betsey Johnson heels, you suddenly became as tall as Taehyung, spinning around to give the boys a complete 360 view. Jimin ‘ooo’ed and Jungkook whistled low in his throat.

“If I wasn’t gay I would be all over you Y/N.” Jimin said in awe, gently running his fingers over your cheek. “Taehyung, you did an astonishing job. Your technique is superb with the winged shapes.”

As Taehyung giggled and thanked the eldest of the group you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist, and you knew it was Jungkook when he chuckled behind you, his hands splaying around your hips.

“Well, I’m not completely gay, so I have every right to hang off of my incredibly gorgeous friend.” You saw Jimin purse his lips at the man behind you and Jungkook whined softly. “Oh c’mon Jiminie, can’t we whisk her off into bliss for one night? They always say that two is better than one.” he teased. You rolled your eyes and removed yourself from his hold.

“I already told you Kookie, I’m not indulging you in your threesome fantasy.” you laughed as he pouted, crossing his arms like a child would.

“But why not?” he whined. Jimin sighed and linked his arm with Jungkook’s, a coy smile playing on his face.

“Because she doesn’t want to Kookie. You’ll just have to deal with me, your loving husband.” Jimin teased, pressing numerous kisses into Jungkook’s pouty cheeks.

“Children,” Taehyung sighed fondly, linking your arm with his. “Now c’mon, or we’re going to be late for our own event!” Taehyung guided you out the door and you couldn’t help but giggle at Jungkook who whined behind you, 

“Oh, so he can hang off Y/N but I can’t?! Totally unfair.”

~*~

“What kind of sick game is he trying to play!?” you yelled in frustration, causing numerous heads to turn towards you. Jungkook chuckled nervously at your outlandish display, guiding you towards the empty bar and away from the public eye.

“Get her a drink, anything, please.” Jungkook turned towards the bartender as you groaned in frustration.

The launch had been going smoothly. Everyone adored the palette, the media attention was great, and you and your boys were having a blast. But right in the middle of it all, when you were talking to the executives of Jancôme, your phone went off. Normally you would ignore notifications during events like this, especially one you worked so hard for, but it was Seokjin. It was Seokjin and you couldn’t help but excuse yourself from the conversation to peer at the Tweet he posted. Jungkook followed in confusion, asking you why you left so abruptly when you exploded, leaving him to guide you to where you were now.

“I can’t believe the nerve of this guy,” you huffed as the bartender brought you a glass of wine. You quickly chugged it down and asked for another before turning on Jungkook. “Look at this!” you slid your phone to him.

The main part of the Tweet was a picture of the four of you in front of the Cake palette display, right next to the actual cupcake display that the owners of your favorite cake ship in Seoul catered for the event. You all were smiling as the owners of the cake shop held cupcakes in their hands, the four of you holding the palettes like you didn’t have a care in the world.

“‘I’m so proud of @BeauVCosmetics for releasing their new #CakePalette, it looks good enough to eat! Almost as good looking as @y/n_l/n007 does in that beautiful dress, own it BeauV Team!’“ you read out loud to Jungkook, shaking your head in disbelief.

“Who does he think he’s fooling, trying to play it off as if we’re friends I mean c’mon! He’s just trying to get a share of the limelight we’ve taken from him and his Bloodlust line.” you shook your head, gripping your second glass of wine hard enough that your knuckles turned white. Jungkook chuckled nervously beside you, awkwardly patting your shoulder in some semblance of comfort. 

“Maybe he really is just trying to be supportive? I mean you said earlier that he believed in us and our business?” Jungkook tried to reason with you. You huffed, standing and grabbing your wine.

“I need some air.” and with that you left him, ignoring Jungkook’s calls of your name and to wait.

You took the elevator up three floors to the rooftop lounge, and once you were out in the open air you allowed yourself to scream in frustration, running a hand through your styled hair as you kicked off your heels. You took a deep breath, looking up at the open sky as you tried to calm the rising anger you felt. But no matter how many times you took deep breaths and counted the stars, you still felt angry. The rooftop was pretty, with lounge chairs and low lighted lanterns in the planter boxes of flowers and small shrubs, but your eyes traveled to the hot tub in the back corner. You marched over to the edge of the hot tub, sticking your feet in the searing water with a shiver as you took a sip of wine.

“I’d give that scream a solid eight.”

You jumped at the sound of another voice, placing your hand over your heart when you realized you weren’t alone. There was a man standing a good couple of feet away from you, leaning against the railing of the roof, and with the low lighting and nighttime sky around you, you couldn’t make out any of his features. How had you not noticed him before?

“You gave me a fright. I’m so sorry for screaming.” you chuckled, splashing the water around you with your right foot. 

“It sounded like you needed it.” he admitted, moving closer towards you as the low lighting began to illuminate his features. 

The man was good looking, extremely so. He wasn’t the traditional kind of handsome like Seokjin was, but he had is own unique charm about him. His cat-like eyes were piercing and when laced with the light, you could clearly read the nonchalant attitude they held. His lips curled up to his left cheek in a half-sided smirk as he sauntered towards you, plopping himself down next to you on the edge of the hot tub with his back facing the water. He tilted his head in your direction, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he offered, his gaze never leaving yours.

“It’s silly, really.” you admitted, staring into your glass of wine as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. You heard him chuckle next to you.

“Do you mind?” he asked, his long fingers wrapped around a pack of smokes. He raised his brows as you looked at the package, gently taking his lower lip between his teeth as he waited for your response.

“Go ahead,” you said. You watched as he put one between his lips, flicking the old zippo lighter he had until the tip of the cig burned bright amber. He puffed out a breath of smoke and looked up at the sky, his eyes wandering over the light of the stars.

“Whenever you want to talk, I’m ready to listen,” he smirked, bringing his attention back on you. “And I know you want to. I can see it behind the hesitation in your eyes.”

Your mouth fell in a gape when you turned to look at him. The man didn’t seem to care though, puffing at his cigarette in content as he looked back up at the sky. You pursed your lips as you mulled over your thoughts, idly kicking at the water. You had already embarrassed yourself in front of this man when you screamed, why not indulge him even further?

“It’s my ex.” you started and the man next to you snorted.

“It always is,” he said through a stream of smoke.

“He cheated on me with some random chick and we broke it off on bad terms. He hurt me and broke my heart when I was in a growing phase in my life and I’m just now getting over him. But then he tries to act like we’re close on social media, complementing me and my team like he cares about us or some shit. It’s fucking pathetic.” the man hummed softly, tapping his foot as he pondered his next words.

“Seems to me like you really cared about him.” you could tell this stranger chose his words carefully and you sighed in defeat, downing the rest of the wine in your glass for liquid courage so you could tell him the truth.

“I did. He believed in me, believed in us, before we were large. He was the one that got us our connections, our distributors, without him our business would be nothing. Without him, I wouldn’t know what pain truly felt like.” you admitted softly, blinking away your tears before the stranger could see you break. Silence greeted you for a few moments, and all you could focus on was the man’s puffs and the bubbling from the hot tub.

“Seems like you’re at an internal war with yourself. On one hand, you thank him for your success, but on the other hand he hurt you beyond the point of repair. You’re not really angry at him for putting on a façade for social media. Are you?” he questioned.

“No,” you sighed. “I’m not mad about that, not really.”

“You’re upset because you feel like he’s playing you, right? Using you for his advantage and knowing he’s over you even though you’re not over him.” the stranger sighed, dragging the nub of his cig across the titles of the hot tub to put it out.

“How do you know all this?” you couldn’t help but ask. The stranger laughed through his nose, looking over at you with a sad smile as the corners of his eyes turned up.

“Because I’ve been there before.” he simply said, chuckling as he pushed himself off the hot tub. “But you know what princess? Things get better. You live, you learn, and you heal eventually. Patience is but a virtue and you have to have a lot of it to heal a broken heart completely.” he held his hand out to you, helping you out of the hot tub with a surprising gentleness. He didn’t let go of your hand as he walked you to your shoes, bending down to pick them up and hand them to you.

“These aren’t my style, but y’know what they say. Every princess needs the perfect pair of shoes. Whether they are heels or Converse, it doesn’t really matter,” he knelt down, taking your foot in his hand as he slid on one shoe, than another. He stood up, grabbing your hands as a smirk laced through his lips when he saw that you towered over him. “As long as they have the perfect fit.”

This man’s words were disarming; you never met someone who spoke as eloquently as he did. And his smile was something else, reserved but open at the same time. He intrigued you in the best of ways and you wanted nothing more than to just sit and talk with him for hours.

“Who are you?”

The man opened his mouth to speak but before he could, the elevator dinged open and out rushed Taehyung, his heels clicking against the ground. You both turned to look at him and when he saw you two his eyes widened, his lips falling open in a soft gasp. You followed his eyes to where yours and the strangers hands were linked, quickly dropping them down to your sides.

“Y/N.” Taehyung broke the silence, moving towards you in swift steps. “We were worried sick. Jungkook came running up to us, saying you stormed off and we couldn’t find you anywhere-”

“Taehyung,” the stranger cut him off. “Y/N’s fine, she’s been up here with me. She just needed to vent for a little bit, isn’t that right?” the stranger playfully nudged your side

“Wait, wait, hold up. You two know each other?” you asked Taehyung, your eyes darting between the two men.

“Y/N, this is Yoongi-hyung, my plus one.”

“Taehyung invited me because he said I needed social interaction,” Yoongi smirked, looking up at his lavish friend. “And much to all our shock I did in fact engage in conversation, even though it wasn’t in the setting you expected, huh Tae?”

“I’ll admit I am surprised hyung. I’m proud of you.” Taehyung smiled, patting his friend on the back. “But c’mon back downstairs you two, the party is still alive and well and people are still dying to chat with you Y/N.” Taehyung grabbed yours and Yoongi’s hands, dragging you into the elevator much to both of your dismays. 

“So how did you two…?” your thought trailed off, wondering how two contrasting men ever came to be friends.

“Meet?” Yoongi chuckled. “At an art gallery in Daegu. Taehyung found me and he was utterly enamored.”

“Hyung,” Taehyung whined. “Don’t say it so lamely. When I heard Yoongi’s music, I knew that we had to be friends. I couldn’t just let raw talent like that walk away from me!”

“I made the music for the event,” Yoongi explained, noticing your confused look. The elevator opened back out into the party and Yoongi clapped his hands together.

“As much as I enjoyed this, I really should be on my way to the other guests. I enjoyed myself tonight Y/N, hopefully we’ll meet again.” he left you and Tae with a parting smile and a flick of his wrist, escaping into the throngs of people. You chuckled, stepping off the elevator with Taehyung, shaking your head.

“Oh, I know that look.” Taehyung frowned, his eyes squinting at the expression he saw in your face. 

“Don’t worry about it Tae.”

Taehyung sighed when you went back out into the crowd, shaking his head in disbelief before immersing himself into the talk of makeup and brand deals.

~*~

Yoongi idly walked through the art exhibition, cigarette between his fingers as he examined the pieces with mild interest. The art gallery was in an outside hotel plaza, fairy lights adorned the trees as Yoongi’s jazz compositions flew through the open air, embracing the guests in the warm comfort that only pianos and saxophones could bring. He hummed along softly to the wordless music as he wandered, coming to stop at a piece depicting an alien world in some nameless galaxy. He chuckled, his eyes never wavering from the painting as he shook his head.

“Y/N?” he called, “Come out from hiding, I know you’re there.”

You cursed under your breath, coming out of the shadows to stand next to Yoongi.

“How’d you know I was here?”

“I guess you could call it a seventh sense,” he told you, sending you a half-sided smirk as he took a drag. “How’d you know I’d be here?”

“Taehyung told me you would. He said you always compose for Art Walk.”

“For good reason. They fund local artists, showcase their work to potential clients. It’s a good organization and event.” Yoongi deliberated, flicking some ash away into the open air. You both stood there in silence for a few minutes, staring at the painting before Yoongi flicked his spent cigarette to the ground, crushing it beneath his foot for good measure.

“Come walk with me.” he told you, turning to stroll through the rest of the gallery. You followed him, idly looking at the various displays with little interest.

“So, why’re you here?” Yoongi asked.

“Can’t I just be here to support local artists?” you defended, making the man next to you chuckle.

“I would’ve believed that if you weren’t hiding behind those trees.”

“Okay, fine, I just really wanted to talk with you again.” you admitted with blush on your cheeks.

“Y’know, most people would just call and ask for a date right?” Yoongi smirked when he saw you sputter, his eyes growing soft when your blush grew.

“W-Who said I wanted to go on a date with you?! Maybe I just wanted to see you in a merely platonic way.” you stuttered. Yoongi hummed, looking at you with a small smile on his face.

“Right.”

You two continued walking through the plaza, thanking god you chose to wear flats to this event instead of heels. Without the added height from your shoes, you were almost level with Yoongi, give or take a couple of inches that his dress shoes gave him. He looked handsome under the soft glow of the lights, his dark hair shining and his all black attire made him look mysterious and provocative. Sure it was just black jeans, a button-up, and a leather jacket, but he made the simple clothing look great. He had in silver earrings, noting that he didn’t have them in at your launch. Could he have been insecure about them enough to take them out as to not make the wrong impression in front of potential clients? You knew Jimin and Jungkook did the same thing (Taehyung, honestly, couldn’t give two fucks about it and kept his earrings in always) but you would’ve thought Yoongi wouldn’t care about trivial things like that. 

“Have you been to the music plaza yet?” Yoongi asked you suddenly, making you jump slightly at the sound of his voice.

“No, I haven’t.” you admitted.

“Would you like to?” he asked, holding his hand out to you. You glanced between his face and his hand for a few seconds too long before Yoongi rolled his eyes. “Fine, don’t hold my hand then.” he teased, dropping his hand back to his side as he walked away. 

You scurried after him, hearing his soft chuckle when you laced your fingers with his. His hand was calloused, but smooth and oh so warm as his long fingers loosely gripped your own. Yoongi began to swing your hands lightly as he guided you out of the art gallery and down the block towards where the bands were playing. He squeezed your hand gently, looking over at you expectantly.

“So, what’re you in the mood for?”

“Hmm,” you pondered your next move carefully. You didn’t know what kind of music Yoongi liked, all you knew was that he made soft jazz. And THAT didn’t help much considering the fact you couldn’t hear any brass elements in the air that made up jazz. 

“Can we wander? Stop at something we both like?” you suggested. Yoongi gave you a nod, before taking you along the avenues of music. Everyone was good, and everyone was talented. Different genres rang through your ears the more you walked and nothing really caught your attention, until you made it down the end of the street. You gripped Yoongi’s hand a little tighter, making him stop in his stroll.

“I didn’t take you as a soft rock fan.” Yoongi chuckled, guiding you closer towards the stage. There were four or five couples slow dancing to the sounds of electric guitar and pounding drums, the tempo slow and steady. The singer’s raspy voice made your heart pound in anticipation as you looked at Yoongi. Would he allow you to slow dance with him and savor the music? Yoongi hummed along to the melody, gently letting go of your hand. You almost whined in protest.

“Now don’t pout,” Yoongi smirked, his eyes light and full of mischief. “Otherwise I may take back my thoughts of asking you for a dance.”

Yoongi’s smirked turned into a full smile when you blushed, taking a step closer to him. Yoongi’s hands guided your arms to drape around his neck, his own wrapping loosely around your waist as he led you in a slow shuffle. You both swayed to music as you turned in slow circles. You noticed Yoongi’s eyes never left your face, even as yours shifted focus from him, to the band, and down to your feet, his eyes were steady like the music. 

“What’re you staring at?” you couldn’t help but ask.

“You,” Yoongi’s voice was soft and endearing, and his bluntness made you part your lips in shock. “Aren’t you supposed to look at your partner when you dance?” Yoongi countered back snidely. You had no comeback for that, so instead you just laid your head down onto Yoongi’s shoulder as you moved.

“So, how’s the business?”

“Going strong, we’re taking a break before we start coming up with more products. We want the Cake hype to die down then wait a couple months before trying to come up with new products.” you spoke softly and Yoongi pulled you closer, whether it was to just hear you better or create more contact you didn’t know, but you liked it.

“And the ex drama?” Yoongi asked. You scoffed, shaking your head into the leather of his jacket.

“Over it. It was silly and he hasn’t done anything since.”

“That’s good to hear. You’re too strong to be hung up over an idiot like that.”

Yoongi’s words made you smile, and you finished the slow dance in silence, clapping and leaving a tip for the band as they packed up their equipment. Yoongi walked you back to your car, making you laugh and making you smile, making you intrigued to want to know more. To know more about him, what he does, what his passions were. You knew you made the right choice when you asked for his number, because the smile he gave you was one like no other as he punched it into your phone. You knew Yoongi was something else, because the only other smile you’ve seen that radiant was from Taehyung, and you wanted to make it appear over and over again.

~*~

Days turned into weeks, and the time you spent with Yoongi increased with each day that passed you by. The more you both talked, the more you both laughed, the more you realized you had some sort of feelings for the man. You didn’t know if it was love, but whatever it was, it was there, and it was growing, and it was so much better than anything you felt with Kim Seokjin. Seokjin was seductive and Seokjin was society’s standard of perfect. But Yoongi? Yoongi was provocative, not in the way he acted, but the way he spoke. His words never failed to make you breathless as your mind pondered over his thoughts. Yoongi was ragged around the edges, but he was beautiful in the way he spoke, the way he acted, in the way his eyes would flicker with sparks when speaking passionately and in the way he really smiled, a thing you’ve seen more as time went on.

And his music was just like him. You couldn’t remember how many times Yoongi asked you to listen to his music, new and old alike to get your opinion. You didn’t realize the extent of his passion and work, originally thinking all he did was instrumental pieces. Oh, was that far from the truth. He rapped, his way with words making memorable compositions that you begged him to let you download for your personal use. He also produced music for others; some fellow rappers and some singers. The variety of music though, is what surprised you the most. Whether it was classical or jazz or rock or rap, Yoongi always added his own flair of life into the music with hip hop undertones and beats you could always count out when listening to the song. 

That’s what you were doing tonight. And as you sat on his bed, waiting for him to start the song, you noticed the hesitation in his eyes.

“You alright Yoongi?” he sighed at the sound of your voice, turning to look at you with a solemn expression, as if he was about to confess his sins to you.

“I want to listen to this song with earbuds this time.” he said, laying down on his side of the bed as he plugged the buds into his phone. This was unusual for him, he always played his songs from his laptop with the speakers on his desk.

“Is there any reason why?” you probed.

“This song…is very dear to me,” he explained. “I wrote it when I was in a very dark place, when my ex broke up with me. I’ve never shared it with anyone before, besides the woman that sings it for me. But I want you to hear it. Because I trust you, Y/N.” he confessed.

“Yoongi-”

“I’m sure I want to do this.” Yoongi stole the words right out of your mouth, the corners of his lips turning upwards at your shock. “You’ve been asking why I act the way I do and speak the way I speak. Well, this explains it all. So come, lay with me.” he patted the open space with one hand, the other offering you the other earbud.

You sighed and laid yourself down next to Yoongi on his bed and allowed the music to consume your entire focus. The bass reminded you of a heartbeat as the vocalist sang behind it; her voice powerful and strong. Soft electronic undertones and piano joined the composition, and your ears felt light as the lyrics dug deep into your heart and rooted themselves in with no intention of coming out. You listened carefully to Yoongi’s words and the emotion he had laced into them. Your eyes welled with tears as the song went on and you tried to blink them away, but Yoongi reached out for your hand, meeting your gaze in dim light of his room. His eyes were dark and stormy and matched the lyrics of the songs perfectly. He shook his head, and with that you allowed the tears to roll freely down your cheeks, squeezing his hand back as the song ended. You both laid together in silence, holding each other’s hands as if they were your lifelines to the real world. 

“You were really hurt.” you stated softly, looking into Yoongi’s soulless eyes. He hummed in acknowledgement, tentatively brushing his fingers along your cheek.

“I was,” he whispered. “I still am sometimes, but it’s okay. I guess that’s why I act and speak the way I do now. I don’t want to be personable nor do I want to be relatable. Reading people comes easy now after that experience, and I keep my distance to keep from hurting again. But it’s okay.”

“Yoongi,” you sat up, pulling Yoongi with you as you took the earbud out of your ear. “I care about you a lot. More than I probably should for knowing you only for a few months. But I really like you. I like you so, so much and I don’t want you to live with the memories of that hurt anymore.” your sudden confession was met with silence at first, but then, Yoongi laughed, removing his own earbud.

“Are you sure?”

“Well, yeah I’m sure.” you chuckled nervously, running a hand through your hair as you blushed. You weren’t planning on sharing your growing feelings with Yoongi, but it was out there, and you couldn’t take it back now. Yoongi didn’t say anything for a minute. He just stared at your fingers that were laced with his. With a sigh, he let go of your hand and you felt your blood run cold.

“I can’t.” he said, shaking his head at you. “I’m sorry.”

“But aren’t you tired Yoongi? Aren’t you tired of living in an inescapable trap of pain?” 

“Of course I am-”

“Then why can’t we heal each other and stop hurting?” you asked. “I want to move on completely, and I want to be happy again, and I want to do it with you. I know it’s hard, living with that hollow feeling pain brings you. But pain doesn’t last forever, I should know, but-”

“I can’t because you don’t love me.” Yoongi said simply, finally turning his head to look at you. “Not really.”

“You don’t know how I feel Yoongi.” he just chuckled, pulling out a smoke and lighting it up.

“You’re right. I don’t know how you feel Y/N. But I do know what love is. And what you have isn’t it.” he paused, contemplating his next words.

“Love isn’t that easy to come about,” Yoongi explained with a sigh of smoke, standing from the bed to languidly pace around the room. 

“We aren’t in a John Green novel or a 90′s rom com. Love is insatiable. Love in the real world isn’t like the Disney fantasies that’ve perpetuated everyone into believing that you can fall in love in a short period of time. Love is-” Yoongi stopped his movement, turning to look into your eyes from across the room. His lips pulled up into a half-smile as the cigarette hung between his teeth.

“Love is raw. Love grows with time, and patience. You can’t just jump into love. You have to earn it, respect it, and let it grow.” Yoongi moved towards you, his gait slow and each step he took felt like minutes were passing by. Finally, he stood in front of you, your head level with his chest. You looked up at him, the white of your eyes growing red with tears. Yoongi blew out a puff of smoke, extinguishing the half used cig with the tips of his fingers and shoving it in his pocket. He gently cupped your cheeks with his hands, tilting his head as his eyes roamed your face. Yoongi sighed out a laugh, gently biting his lower lip as he shook his head.

“Y’know, I told myself I was never going to fall in love again. And that plan was working just fine until I met you. What I feel isn’t true love, not yet anyways. But it’s enough to know I can’t deny my feelings for you.” his thumbs rubbed your cheeks as he spoke, his gaze never wavering.

“But you, princess, are surely mistaken. You don’t love me. You love the idea of me. The idea of a happy ending after the pain you’ve just been through. An easy way out. Hmm?” Yoongi wiped at the tears that fell down your cheeks, mascara caking onto his thumbs. He gently shushed you, guiding your head to lay against his chest as you hugged him around his middle. Yoongi began to hum, gently rocking you as you cried. 

You cried because he was right. You cried because you were mistaking friendship for love; and everything became clearer once Yoongi said those words. Because what you felt, felt like how you did with Taehyung, only intensified from the newness of the experience. All the blushing, all the nerves and racing heartbeats, came because you had only done those things with past lovers, and with Taehyung. And the idea of Yoongi being in the same realm as Taehyung never crossed your mind, only the thoughts of a potential lover did, spurred on from impatience of finding some semblance of love again to rid yourself of the lingering pain in your heart. Even though Yoongi was more reserved than Taehyung was, both men had that flirty edge to them, and both loved contact. Maybe you had really undermined them and their personalities; they were more alike than you thought. Once you realized this you just cried harder, for not only leading Yoongi on, but for being so stupid as to mistake what you felt for romantic love. Were you really that desperate?

“I’m sorry.” you gasped into his chest.

“It’s okay Y/N. Just let it out.” he coaxed, placing a kiss into your hair. 

“You’re right. You’re always right about how I feel. I’m such a fool.” you sniffled, peering back to look up at Yoongi’s blank face.

“You’re not foolish to want something, Y/N. It’s not foolish to want love, not at all. But that love won’t be with me. Princess, you’re beautiful. Smart. Insightful. You’ll find your Prince Charming eventually. I promise you that. You just need time, that’s all.” he smiled down at you sadly.

“I’m willing to wait.” you tried to give the man a feeling of hope, but he just chuckled.

“I’ll believe you if you can come back to me and say those same words of confession in a year.” he smiled. “I’ve been patient all these years, what’s a couple more added on? I don’t think I’m going to hurt very much anymore, now that I know you.”

“I’m sorry Yoongi. But I do like you, platonically that is, can we still be-”

“Don’t.” Yoongi cut you off, shaking his head slightly. “Don’t say the ‘f’ word yet, because once you say it, everything’s going to change for me.”

“Yoongi…”

“Can I do something? Can I do something before we shift into being just friends? So I don’t regret anything.” Yoongi’s words were ominous, but you nodded anyways. He stared at you with a newfound determination at your approval, his eyes searching yours intently. 

“What’re you waiting for?” you whispered.

“I want to remember every detail of this, so I don’t forget.”

Yoongi nodded once before leaning down to place a kiss on your lips. His lips were firm and warm, the taste of smoke filling your senses as your lips moved against each other. His movements were languid and slow and you wrapped your arms around his neck to relish in the feeling of being kissed again. You felt fingers tug at your hair, angling your face up to give Yoongi better access to your mouth as his tongue gently parted your lips, meeting your tongue with calculated strokes. There was no rush to the kiss, nor was there any urgency behind it; the two of you were content in just savoring the feeling of warmth spreading through your veins. To savor the feeling of being held with such love and care, of feeling protected and safe within the grasp of another. 

You parted from Yoongi’s lips with a soft gasp, your noses bumping together as you caught your breath. You could’ve sat there and kissed Yoongi for hours, you didn’t want the feelings to end. Yoongi chuckled low in his throat, leaving a peck against your lips.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “That was amazing, and more than I could’ve ever hoped for.”

“Of course,” you whispered.

“Y’know, Taehyung told me about the time you both kissed in middle school, how you were each other’s first kiss.” Yoongi smiled, moving to sit next to you. “Since I figured our friendship is gonna be like yours and Tae’s, we should kiss at least once. That and because I just really wanted to.”

You groaned in horror that Yoongi knew that secret, burying your face in your hands. The mood was completely gone now.

“I’m gonna kill that son-of-a-”

“Easy there tiger,” Yoongi chuckled, “No need to get all worked up. It’s cool.”

“It was supposed to be a secret though.”

“I think it’s cute. Since you’re both still close.” Yoongi admitted and you smiled sheepishly at him.

“Taehyung called me after the Cake launch y’know? Telling me that you were curious about me. He also told me not to hurt you if anything happened between us. He really cares about you, you know that?” Yoongi continued on, a small smile gracing his lips.

“Taehyung…” you paused, trying to come up with the right words to say. “Taehyung means the world to me. He’s been with me through thick and thin.” you admitted.

“And you mean the world to him too.” Yoongi said.

“How long have you known that I didn’t really love you?” you couldn’t help but ask, the curiosity was eating you alive.

“Art walk,” Yoongi shrugged. “You didn’t have that spark, and even though your body language said differently, I think it was because you were nervous. And to be physically intimate like that with a new person always gets pheromones running.”

“Hit it right on the head,” you chuckled. “I wanted to know more about you. I love the way you talk and provoke the mind with your thoughts.”

“That’s an overtly sexual way of saying ‘You have a cool brain, let’s be friends so I can talk to you.’“ you giggled at Yoongi’s bluntness, shaking your head at him.

“You really meant what you said?” you asked.

“About?”

“About me finding love, you think I can?”

Yoongi just smiled, taking your hand into both of his own.

“Well, I never lie. And yes, I do. Like I said, you’re beautiful, smart, an amazing kisser,” Yoongi paused to send you a cheesy wink. “You’ll find love and get your happily ever after. Believe me, you will. Even if it isn’t with me, I’ll still be happy when you finally meet the right person for you, and I expect every single detail when it does happen. And like my mother always said; good things come to those who wait.”


	3. Trust

You didn’t know what time it was, nor did you seem to care as your fingers diligently typed away at the computer in front of you. The blue haze was your only source of light as you worked in the darkness of your office, besides the faint white light that shined through the glass walls from the end of the hallway. Your eyes were glazed over and your back was bent, leaning towards the screen almost as if that would make you work faster and quicker. But you knew that it was moot. Nothing was working. According to your sales charts and collective data, nothing you would produce would live up to the hype that was Cake. Sure, Taehyung’s creative visions were produced and marketed, as well as the occasional idea from Jimin and Jungkook, and they did well! Don’t confuse yourself, because those sales were great and profitable. But they didn’t reach the numbers that Cake did. None of these ideas that were pitched two days ago would either, according to your analysis. And you were panicking. Sales were steady for now, but were projected to drop off in the next year if you and your team didn’t get something out soon. You refused to be ‘The Proclaimers’ of the makeup industry, only having one huge one-hit wonder then retire after a crappy attempt at a second album (in your case, makeup line). This was your newest dilemma, and oh were you stressed. 

You sighed, running a hand down your face to try and wake yourself up, but it was to no avail. You plopped your head down onto your desk, repeatedly banging your forehead against the cool glass. A soft tapping sound made you look up from your fit, and like an angel descending from the gates of heaven was Taehyung. His manicured nails tapped against the door again, looking at you through the glass with the softest expression you’ve ever seen him have. You tilted your head, and Taehyung entered, pulling along one of the chairs in your office so he could sit with you. Once he plopped down next to you, you sighed, looking up into his eyes.

“Hi,” you mumbled guiltily.

“Hi.” Taehyung’s lips pulled up into a smile, but you could tell from his eyes he wasn’t exactly happy with you. “You know it’s 4 a.m. right?”

“No,” you admitted. “I wasn’t keeping track of the time.”

Taehyung sighed, leaning across the desk to turn on the little lamp there, basking the room into a soft golden glow. He gently closed the laptop in front of you, forcing you to focus only on him. 

He looked beautiful. He always did. White-washed jeans, white t-shirt, round glasses, and his shaggy grey hair really did make him look angelic. He was actually dressed down today. There was no elaborate makeup like usual, only a simple coverup and a swipe of something glossy on his lips. And his jewelry was barren, only simple silver studs were in his ears and a silver band around his pointer finger. This made your eyes crinkle.

“What’s wrong?” you asked him. Taehyung pursed his lips.

“Why would something be wrong?”

“Because you haven’t dressed this simply since high school.” you argued, and this made Taehyung smile.

“Can’t I dress down every once in a while?” he countered.

“Without eyeshadow and contouring?” your eyes studied his face carefully, the corners of your lips twitching in amusement. “Bitch, please.”

This made Taehyung laugh, long and hearty, and you couldn’t help but join him.

“Okay, fine, I resent.” Taehyung said through his dying giggles. “It’s the boys.” you furrowed your brows at his words, shifting to look at him more clearly.

“What’s wrong? Are they okay?” Taehyung sighed, idly picking through the papers on your desk.

“I had to take them into emergency care this morning.”

“What!?” you gasped, watching Taehyung’s face contort into one of despair. You took his hand into yours, scooting closer so that your knees were touching underneath the desk. 

“Both of them?” Taehyung nodded, and with that you pulled him in for a hug, practically pulling the larger male into your lap as he sighed against your neck.

“Will they be okay though?” you mumbled, and you felt Taehyung nod against your skin.

“They’ll be stuck at the hospital for a while though.”

“Hey, look at me,” you guided Taehyung’s head up so you could look at him. “Yeontan and V are the strongest boys I know, they’ll be okay, I promise.”

“It was V that was having complications this morning, and you know how Yeontannie is. He didn’t want to leave his big brother so I had no choice but to leave him with V at the emergency vet center. They’ll be there for the rest of the week.” Taehyung lips pulled into a frown. 

“I was lonely without my fluffy boys, I couldn’t sleep without them in bed with me so that’s why I came to the office. Only to find the second most important girl in my life here looking like a hermit slouched over her computer. So now it’s your turn. What’s wrong?”

“Who’s the most important girl in your life?” you asked curiously.

“My mother.” Taehyung giggled. 

“Fair enough.” you chuckled as Taehyung moved back into his chair. 

“So what’s up Y/N? It’s not like you to stay and work overnight.”

“I know,” you sighed, looking down at the remnants of your work clothes. You had taken off your blouse and changed into one of the BeauV Cosmetics t-shirts that were left in the stock room, the letters curly and bright blue against the black background. You still wore your shorts, opting for the denim instead of your usual work pants since you didn’t have any meetings today. And your heels were in the corner, sparkling and golden. “I’ve been running projections all night.”

“And?” Taehyung asked. You sighed, opening your laptop. Taehyung peered over your shoulder as you pulled up multiple screens and analysis. 

“We’ll be steady for a year before sales will start to exponentially go down. We need another constant. We need another Cake. Another V line, another PJM or JJK. Because everything newer is okay, don’t get me wrong. We have sales and everything. But it’s nothing compared to our first stuff. We’ve been playing too safe recently and until we come up with something amazing, by this time next year we might be forgotten.”

“You know the fans wouldn’t let that happen,” Taehyung tried to reassure you. You knew he was right. You had a loyal fanbase. But…

“Yeah I know. But we’re no James Charles or Jeffree Star. We have fans, sure, but our following isn’t as large.” Taehyung sighed, grabbing your hand just like how you grabbed his.

“You’re right babe, we don’t have as many fans as they do. But y’know what? We aren’t them. We’re us. We’re BeauV. We’re Y/N, Jimin, Jungkook, and Taehyung. And I wouldn’t change it for the world. We’re amazing, we’re beautiful, and we’re gonna get through this. We just…need a creative spark to boost us up is all.” Taehyung smiled as you contemplated his words.

“And how do you suggest we do that?”

~*~

You crossed your arms as you watched your three friends run around the parking lot, admiring and drooling over the vintage cars. Taehyung had flown you all out to America, Arizona to be exact, for a well needed vacation. He said taking a break and getting out of the country would help get the creative juices flowing. Why he had picked Arizona of all places you didn’t know, but you had to admit you loved the desert. The bright orange Rockies and clear blue skies were visually stunning. 

“Y/N! Y/N!” Jungkook ran up to you, his eyes shinning with child-like glee. “Come look at the car we picked out!” he grabbed your hand, tugging you through the hot, dry air to meet Jimin and Taehyung.

“Oh,” you gasped, gently running the tips of your fingers over the hot, red metal. It was like stepping into every 1950′s movie you watched as a child, the old school Chevy was cherry red, and it’s white top was down, showing off the red leather. The whitewall tires were to die for and you instantly had a craving for Coca-Cola. 

“Beautiful, right?” Jimin chuckled, jumping into the backseat. “She’s ours for the next two weeks!”

“How expensive-”

“Hush,” Taehyung shushed you, placing a finger over your lips. “It’s fine Y/N. Money is but an object.”

“But the business-”

“Y/N,” Jungkook whined, his lips pulling into a pout as he joined Jimin in the back. “This vacation is supposed to take our minds off work, just relax. It’s fine.”

“He’s right. We have savings sweetie, it’s okay, just enjoy yourself.” Jimin coaxed you with a gentle smile. 

“C’mon,” Taehyung opened the passenger door for you, allowing you to sit against the warm leather seats. He closed the door, quickly running to the drivers side before starting the car. The engine purred to life and it’s rumble made your heart beat faster. 

Taehyung drove out of the lot with a squeal of the tires and out into the Arizona sun. The wind whipped through your hair and in between your fingers as you stared in awe at the mountains and cactuses and the long, dusty asphalt roads. Taehyung blared music through the radio, classic rock ringing through your ears with the sounds of the whipping wind. You could hear Jimin and Jungkook singing behind you, and you turned around to sneak a peak at them. 

Their hair was wild, whipping through the wind like yours, but their smiles were radiant, taking in the sun and music as you all drove deeper into the desert. They looked so happy and carefree, so beautiful and so loved that it made your heart clench. They put on each other’s sunglasses and when Jungkook caught you staring he just giggled, pulling an extra pair from his bag and shoving them up your nose, the bright, neon colors becoming a little muted. He bopped your nose, making you smile as you turned to Taehyung. 

He had his sunglasses on too, the wired ones with the pink lenses in them. His smile didn’t waver, weaving the car through twists and turns that caused you all to laugh from the speed. He caught your eye, sending you a sly wink when he grabbed your hand, pulling them up into the wind flying by. You laughed at his antics, throwing up your other hand and for the first time in a long while, you finally felt free. Free from the work, free from the stress. 

You were finally able to just let go. 

You screamed in joy, joining the boys singing in the backseat and you felt like you were home. You could feel the love your boys had for you and each other, and you hoped that they could feel your love for them too. You felt two other hands join yours and Taehyungs in the air, and when you looked and saw all your boys smiling at you, all of you holding each other’s hands, you knew you’d rather be no where else but here underneath the Arizona sun. 

The afternoon went on, the music never stopping and the wind always blowing. The sun soon began to set, and when you stopped for gas you all changed positions as you stretched your legs. Now Jimin was driving; Taehyung joined him up front as you and Jungkook lounged in the backseat. Jimin was slower in his driving, barely going over 30 mph, taking the backroads so that you all could cruise and watch the sunset. 

You were laying against Jungkook, your back pressed up against his chest as both your legs tangled across the length of the seat, Jungkook’s feet touching the other side of the car. You were idly taking pictures of the sunset with your phone, capturing the shades of orange, pink and purple while Jimin and Taehyung sang soft tunes in the front seats, their voices calming as the light breeze traveled around you. Jungkook’s arms were wrapped around you, the fabric of his hoodie soft and comforting. You snuggled further into his embrace, taking your final pictures before dropping your phone to the floor of the car, turning to hide your face into his chest. Jungkook chuckled, nudging his nose against the curve of your cheek gently, his wispy hair tickling your skin.

“Comfortable, sweetheart?” he hummed, his hands gently rubbing circles into your stomach. You nodded, gently grabbing one of Jungkook’s hands as you closed your eyes, feeling Jungkook’s smile against your skin.

“Aww, how cute.” Taehyung cooed from the front seat. You heard Jimin laugh, and could imagine him shaking his head in disbelief. 

“It is pretty cute, the two of them all wrapped up together like that.” Jimin admitted, a light giggle falling past his lips. You heard the shutter of a camera and Taehyung giggling.

“Adorable, especially with the sunset around them,” Jimin cooed, “You really do love cuddling with women, huh Kookie?” Jimin teased, and you could feel Jungkook laugh into your hair.

“I love cuddling with Y/N,” he corrected, “Besides, she lets me be the big spoon.”

Taehyung laughed at this, teasing Jimin for being the big spoon when Jungkook clearly had a good few inches on him.

“Women are just better cuddlers,” Taehyung admitted with a wistful sigh. “They’re so soft, and warm. Plus their boobs dude, they’re like little pillows.”

You giggled into Jungkook’s chest, and if only you could see the bright smile he gave you, his teeth poking out behind his lips as he giggled too.

“Don’t worry babe, you’re still an amazing cuddler.” Jungkook reassured his husband, his fingers gently squeezing your own. “But sometimes you just want a woman’s touch.”

“As long as it’s consensual I don’t care,” Jimin rolled his eyes playfully, a flirtatious glint etched in them. “Besides, I know you’ll always be back in my bed at the end of the day. You can’t resist this ass.” Jimin blew him a kiss and Taehyung laughed so hard that tears pooled into his eyes. 

The sky soon became dark, the stars shining in more amounts than you’ve ever seen, and you all stared in awe at the mass amount of them without the city lights around you.

“We need to find a place for the night.” Jimin said.

“Just keep going down this road, take the right fork back to the main road and go down a couple miles, I found a little place to stay at before we left.” Taehyung told Jimin.

“Jungkookie?”

“Hmm?”

“Where’re we going? What’s our final destination?” Jungkook just smiled, placing a peck into the palm of your hand.

“The beauty of spontaneity Y/N, is that you never really know. But just enjoy the adventure, Taehyung knows what he’s doing.” he whispered to you.

After another fifteen minutes you were all pulling up to an adobe styled hotel, with a central plaza and all. You all took your luggage from the trunk, admiring the clay walls and oil paintings as the hotel keeper showed you all to your rooms. You were with Taehyung again, to save money he said, but really you knew he was lonely without his fluffy dogs to keep him warm at night. Your suspicions were confirmed when you were met with only one, king-sized bed (Jimin and Jungkook later telling you that they both had one as well). The room was tan and beautiful, traditional art and rugs of the region were scattered about and the tiles of the floor were white and pristine. 

You were allowed five minutes to freshen up before the boys pulled you out to hunt for food, finding yourself in a saloon-esque building in another ten. There was a bar on one wall and tables with hungry patrons against the other, but the stage is what caught your eye the most. You knew the building had to have been a strip club at one point, the long cat-walk isle down the center of the room made that obvious. It was unoccupied however, the band of the evening opting to stay on the main stage instead. There were people dancing to the music as well, making you smile and think of the last time you danced with Yoongi under the moonlight. You wondered how he was doing and decided to text him later, after all, he _was_ watching your houseplants for you.

Once your bellies were full of stew and dirty rice, you and Taehyung watched Jimin and Jungkook dance all around the wooden floors as you both nursed glasses of local whiskey. Taehyung hummed low in his throat and you figured now would be as good a time as any to bring up something that was pestering in your mind.

“Tae?”

“Hmm?”

“Why did you tell Yoongi about our kiss?” you asked softly. No one knew about that fact except you three, not even Jimin or Jungkook who’ve been with you both for years. Taehyung sighed, groaning softly when he pulled his arms up in a stretch. 

“Confidant?” he said easily, rolling his eyes playfully when he saw your serious expression. “Okay fine. I told him about it as a tipoff.”

“A tipoff for what?” you questioned.

“After Art Walk, Yoongi called me and asked about you. He was whipped for you, extremely so. But that look you had in your eyes after we all left the elevator the night of the Cake launch, I knew you weren’t going to fall in love with him. You were pursuing him after a bad breakup Y/N, it was obvious you were drawn to Yoongi for his comforting words and wisdom. But he was persistent, so then I started talking about us, our friendship, and the kiss was mentioned in passing as a way just to get it over with. A friend trusting a friend. I think that gave him the tipoff that you were only seeing him as some sort of sanctuary. Yoongi knew it too, but he really wanted another’s opinion. And when it comes to you, who knows you better than me?” Taehyung shrugged, taking a sip of his drink. 

“So it was really you that prevented me and Yoongi from getting together.” you huffed, your lips pulling up. “You conniving little shit.” you smacked his arm and he just chuckled.

“Are you mad?”

“No,” you paused, tilting your head in thought. “If you would’ve told me that a few months ago, yes. But I’m kinda glad you did. I don’t want to be in a relationship based on false emotions. I was rushing to find love, but now I know good things come to those who wait.”

“Amen to that.” Taehyung raised his glass, clinking it with yours as you both downed the rest of your whiskey. “Come dance,” he ushered you out of your seat when a slower song started playing. He pressed his chest to your back as he guided you into a slow sway, his arms draped across your waist. You rolled your eyes, allowing your hands to grip onto his biceps.

“You’ve been working out.” you commented.

“Mmhmm.” he hummed into your hair.

“Who’re you trying to impress?” you teased.

“You,” he winked and he took your slap in stride. “What? I’m serious.”

“And so am I. We’ve already talked about this.”

“Blah, blah, blah.” Taehyung mocked you, placing a kiss on your cheek. “You know you want me.”

“Only if neither of us are married by thirty-five.”

“Hey, it was thirty last time, you keep changing our contract.” Taehyung whined.

“Ugh, fine. Thirty then. Now for real, who’s the lucky person?”

“There’s a cute newbie working with the scientists,” he mumbled and you could feel the warmth of his blush rise. “He’s extremely sweet and endearing, a total fitness junkie. Him and Kookie workout sometimes. But I think he finds me intimidating and weird.”

“Is it the clothes, the elaborate makeup, or the flamboyantness do you think?” you teased and Taehyung whined behind you. “Okay, okay. Honestly, just talk to him Tae? If he doesn’t like you, your fishnets and crop-tops, your heels or your makeup then he doesn’t deserve someone as wonderful as you.”

“You’re too sweet,” Taehyung cooed, “But thank you.”

You hummed in acknowledgement, continuing to sway in place as you watched Jimin and Jungkook across the dance floor. They were entangled together, light staccato kisses being pressed between their lips as they held each other close. Your heart clenched; they looked so in love it was almost sickening, and no matter how much they teased each other or joked about having threesomes (honestly though, with Jungkook being Jungkook, you wouldn’t doubt it to be very real between them) they always ended up back together in each other’s arms. You guessed that’s what marriage entailed; always wanting to come back to the one you loved the most, the one you’d want to spend the rest of your life with. 

“Well I’ll be damned.” a voice broke you out of your stupor. “Y/N L/S, is that really you?”

You looked up and you gasped, easily breaking out of Taehyung’s grasp as you both looked at the person who spoke in shock. 

~*~

_“Hoseok?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Do you think we’ll ever see each other again?”_

_“I’m moving to L.A., not to the moon.” the boy laying next to you chuckled, leaning over to place a tender kiss against your cheek._

_“I know, but it’s still so far away, and I’ll miss you.” you admitted, a soft sigh expelling from your lips._

_“Hey, look at me,” Hoseok cooed, taking one of your hands. You glanced over at him._

_“I promise I’ll call, hell I’ll even write if I have to. Trust me, I’m not going to forget you Y/N.” he smiled, radiant and bright. “And after I graduate high school, I’m going to work and make enough money to move back home to be with you.”_

~*~

You thought Hoseok had forgotten you. After he had left with his family, he did call, almost everyday. But as the months went on, after he had graduated, the calls came less and less, and eventually they just stopped. Oh, how you remember the longing for him to call you back, to return just one call, but he never did. It didn’t really “hurt”, after all, you both had left each other on good terms and it was a fleeting high school relationship. One filled with shy kisses and passing notes in class. You knew Hoseok must’ve been busy, making a living in America would certainly be a good enough excuse to forget to call. But he was still your first love, and his actions and loss in a promise made you guard the promises you chose to make, keeping those words tight and close until you knew you could trust another to not break them like Hoseok had. Even when Seokjin came along, the first man you were with after Hoseok, you still kept your guard up, albeit less than before. 

But of all things, you didn’t expect to see him standing in front of you, in a musty saloon in the middle of nowhere in Arizona, many years later. 

“Hoseok?” you questioned, carefully taking a step forward. 

He looked completely different from what you’ve remembered him to be. You always saw the eighteen year-old in your mind whenever you thought of him; mousey brown hair, scattered acne, gangly limbs, bright eyes and a smile to match. The man in front of you had dark red hair, matching the mountains of the desert. His face was tan, smooth, clear, and his arms and legs were taut with muscle and a few scattered scars. But you knew that smile anywhere, and those bright eyes haven’t aged a day, but still, you didn’t want to believe it was him. 

“Who’s my favorite Backstreet Boy?” you asked suddenly and Taehyung giggled behind you. Hoseok rolled his eyes.

“Really, the security question Y/N? C’mon, it’s me.” he tried again, taking a step closer to you.

“Then the answer should be easy.” you challenged.

“Y/N,” Taehyung shook his head with a chuckle, moving in front of you to give your friend a hug. Hoseok chuckled as Taehyung bounded into his arms, holding him close.

“Good to see you too Tae.” he ruffled the younger’s hair, looking at you expectantly. “Don’t I get a hug from you, Y/N?”

“Not until you answer the question.” you were persistent, and you must’ve spoken a little too loud, because Jimin and Jungkook came wandering over.

“Is there a problem here?” Jungkook asked defensively, wrapping a protective arm around your shoulder. Hoseok’s eyes followed Jungkook’s grip, a dark flash of something passing through them before they turned bright again.

“Stand down lover boy,” Taehyung chuckled. “This is Hoseok, a childhood friend from high school.”

“Oh! Nice to meet you!” Jimin, the ever loving man that he was, held out his hand and Hoseok took it with a smile.

“Y/N, this is ridiculous-”

“The security questions weren’t ridiculous in high school.” you countered. 

“That was eight years ago!” Hoseok laughed, shaking his head. “And us three made those up in case a zombie apocalypse broke out and someone was trying to impersonate us.”

“If you could remember all that you should know the answer.” you raised your eyebrow and Hoseok sighed, pursing his lips as he stared at Jungkook’s hand again, the boy’s arm still wrapped around you protectively. 

“Your favorite Backstreet Boy is Nick Carter, because he could dance really well. You used to tease me about him being a better dancer than me just to rile me up.” Hoseok smirked and you sighed in defeat

“Now c’mere,” Hoseok held his arms open and you moved into him, allowing his arms to wrap around you.

Damnit, he was warm, and he smelled so good. You relaxed in hold involuntarily, your guard dropping.

“I’ve missed you. So, so much.” he whispered into your ear. You pulled away from him with a small smile.

“I’ve missed you too, but you have a lot of explaining to do.”

~*~

“You have every right to be upset-”

“Damn right I do.” you agreed, watching as the boys danced around while you and Hoseok took refuge at the table. Taehyung ushered the other two out to dance, knowing you’d want to talk with Hoseok alone and after a few shots, they were more than willing to do so as more party-goers came out to dance to the country twang as the night grew darker.

“You broke your promise.” you continued, your voice a little softer this time. “You, sir, are the cause of a lot of trust issues.”

“Guilty,” Hoseok chuckled, and his laugh was contagious. “After graduation, I knew I didn’t want to stay in L.A.”

“Why’s that?”

“It was too artificial, too showy. But I loved the desert, I loved the mountains.” Hoseok eyes lit up. “I taught dance while I was there though, saved money and bought my own car and I just drove and drove until the car broke down at a Native American reservation about fifty miles from here, over the river.” he paused, biting his lip.

“Hobi?” you questioned, and the corners of his lips turned up at the use of your old nickname.

“Most of the money I saved was originally going towards a plane ticket, to go back home to Korea. To see you.” he admitted. “But something called me here. I couldn’t let it go, so I took the risk and I’ve never been happier. The population is less than 5,000, quiet and local. And I work as a river guide, taking groups down the rapids for hours at a time. I even do multi day excursions, just exploring the flora and fauna and meeting wonderful people as we camp under the stars.”

“Well, that explains the muscles.” you chuckled. Hoseok sighed, reaching out to take your hand in his.

“There hasn’t been a day that’s gone by where I didn’t think about calling you. About calling your parents or Taehyung when one day your number just didn’t go through anymore. It’s hard out here though, signal’s are always going out.”

“When it was in though, why didn’t you?” you asked. “I missed you, Hoseok. You were my first love, but more than that, you were my friend too.”

“I don’t know why,” he answered honestly. “But I can tell you I missed you too. So much. I saw you in the cactus flowers, the stars in the sky, but none of them compare to you now. You’re so much more beautiful than I remembered you to be.” you chuckled, shaking your head at him.

“You still have your way with words.” you teased.

“No, I genuinely mean it Y/N.” he gripped your hand tighter. “You look more…relaxed, more glowing and bright. It’s gorgeous, you’re gorgeous.”

“Oh, stop.” you blushed, avoiding his gaze.

“I won’t, I have seven years of complimenting to catch up on. I know I’ve broken my promise of coming back, but I never stopped thinking about you in the corner of my mind. Can you forgive me for hurting you? For breaking your trust?” you’ve never heard Hoseok beg before, but you guessed this would as close as you can get to it. He looked so hopeful. You sighed, picking up your drink and taking a tentative sip as Hoseok was practically falling off the edge of his seat. 

“I’ll forgive, but I won’t forget Mr. Jung.” you smirked and Hoseok’s smile permeated your heart and warmth spread through your belly, but you blamed the whiskey for that. 

“I’ll take what I can get.” Hoseok chuckled, his thumb gently rubbing over the back of your hand. “So, what’ve you been doing on the other side of the world while I’ve been scaling the white waters?”

“Well, remember Tae and I’s dream of having our own company?”

“Nah, shut up. You guys didn’t.” Hoseok exclaimed, his smile growing as you pulled up your company’s website on your phone, showing him the PR photos of you and the three boys posing with the Cake palette, each one’s eyeshadows depicting a different look with a mirage of colors. 

“We did.” you giggled as Hoseok scrolled through the products with awe in his eyes.

“I can’t believe it, I’m so proud!” he said, pushing your phone back to you. “Was that Taehyung’s idea? The whole food/cake thing?”

“Actually, it was mine. Our top seller too. These were Tae’s. And Jungkook’s and Jimin’s.” you puffed your chest out with pride, pointing at all of the products. 

“Well I’ll be damned then. It’s beautiful.” Hoseok gave you a thumbs up. “But why is that the only thing you’ve created? Clearly you have the talent.”

“I’ve been having a lot of stress lately. With the marketing, the projections, worrying about finances with Kookie and promotional and social media with Jimin, and allowing Taehyung to experiment and create at his own free will, I guess I lost my creative spark.” you admitted with a sigh. “That’s why we’re all here. Taehyung booked us this vacation to help us relax and get the creativity flowing again, because if we don’t have another sale like Cake, we’re slowly going to go under.”

Hoseok hummed softly in understanding. 

“I guess there’s also the ‘second project’ syndrome that’s messing with my mind too. I’m afraid that whatever I design and produce with the boys won’t live up to the Cake palette’s hype. Cake sold out completely in Korea in two days, and two weeks later they were sold out internationally. Our workers were doing overtime to keep up with sales.” you continued. “I just feel stuck. Even though this place makes me feel free, I know I’ll have to return to that limbo when it’s done, and that scares me.”

“Y’know what you need?” Hoseok told you.

“What?”

“A sense of freedom.”

~*~

That’s what prompted you and the boys to stay in Hoseok’s house for the remainder of your vacation. His house was comfy enough for the five of you, and the homey touches did make you feel better than staying in an artificial hotel. 

Hoseok helped you all let go. 

Hoseok took you all to see the secrets of the mountains and canyons, the river guiding you down trails of adrenaline and clarity. The hiking brought you beautiful horizons, the cactuses providing nourishment from the source, and the river brought you splashing wars and chicken fights, of gentle floating in ravines and laying out on the red sandbars, but it also brought you adventure as the rapids licked your cheeks and flew you over rocks and mini waterfalls. And the rocks aided you all, providing stepping stones, glimpses into the wildlife’s habitat, and great heights to fall into deep pockets of water. Jimin documented it all, only posting the best pictures of your vacation to your SMS, much to Taehyung’s dissatisfaction (”Hyung! I don’t have makeup on, you can’t post that!” “But Taehyung, none of us are, we’re all barefaced.” “Yeah but you guys actually look good without makeup.”).

As Hoseok took you out more and more, your trust in him began to grow again. He showed you friendship, he showed you consistency, he showed you attentiveness and honesty, giving you his everything and anything. He jumped off the cliffs with you into the waters below, he showed you the scorpions and lizards with careful hands, gave you prickly pears and their juice when there wasn’t enough for the five of you, and he fought with you in the water against the other boys, comradery and unity forming between you both again. You both fell back into the friendship you thought you lost, and Hoseok made your heart feel light. You trusted him, from his reoccurring actions and signs of love and clarity. And you had forgiven him, understanding now how easy it would be to isolate yourself into the land of red rocks and sand, living without a care in the world as the sun stroked your back and dried your hair into knots and waves. 

The two weeks seemed to go by too fast, but you knew it happened from the looks of your sun-kissed skin and water-logged locks. A few scars and bruises also joined your skin, caused by falling out of the raft on the rapids and landing on hidden rocks beneath the water. You found yourself and the boys lounging out poolside on the last night of your vacation while Hoseok cleaned up the dinner of smoked barbeque and margaritas. You were laying out on one of Hoseok’s pool chairs with your sketch book, drawing the mountains and setting sun while watching Taehyung and Jungkook fight in the pool. Jimin sat next to you, flipping through the pictures he took that day.

“Y/N?” Jimin called. You looked up at him over the edge of your sunglasses before you heard him snap a picture. He smiled, looking up at you with sweet eyes.

“Beautiful.” he told you, showing you the picture. Your sunglasses and floppy sun hat blocked half of your face, but the edge of a smile laced your lips as Jimin captured your natural expression. You could see the base colors on your sketch pad, your coverup only barely revealing the bikini top you wore with your shorts and flip flops. Your hair was wavy from the chlorinated water you were swimming in earlier, and your cheeks were pink and speckled with sun freckles.

“You really are talented with a camera Jiminie.” you complimented him.

“It’s all you sweetie, just an au-natural Y/N. Beautiful in her natural state.” Jimin’s words made you blush, normally he wasn’t this foreword with you, his flirtation usually just reserved for Jungkook. “I’m so posting this as a teaser that we’re working creatively again.”

“Go ahead Jimin, I won’t whine about it like some people.” you said with a chuckle.

“Heard that!” Taehyung yelled before he was shoved underneath the water again by Jungkook.

“I agree with Jimin.” Hoseok was suddenly behind you, making you jump in surprise. “You look beautiful with Arizona written all over you.”

When Hoseok told you that he would be catching up on his compliments he wasn’t kidding, giving you at least one every day. You didn’t know if it was because he felt guilty or really just wanted you to feel beautiful. Whatever it was though, you appreciated it immensely, his words doing wonders to your ego and self confidence.

“I wanna show you something.” Hoseok told you. His eyes had that spark in them, and you could tell he was eager to drag you out for the rest of the night.

“Okay.”

Hoseok grinned, grabbing your hand and dragging you out the back gate of his home, taking you up the side of the mountain in his backyard. You giggled when he became too excited, almost falling off the side of the red rock with a sheepish smile, heading your advice to go just a little slower. You hiked up the path until the sun had set, following Hoseok until he pulled you away from the main path, following the curves of the rocks until he led you to a tunnel.

“Hoseok…”

“Hmm? Are you scared?” Hoseok teased, playfully pinching your sides.

“It’s really dark,” you said hesitantly, peering into the hole in the rock formation.

“C’mon, it’s safe enough, it’s like a slide.” he smiled, sitting down on the sandy gravel. “I’ll even hold you if you want. Please? It’ll be so worth it.” he held his hand out to you, the other patting the open space between his legs. You bit your lip, your eyes flickering between his expectant stare and the darkness of the tunnel. With a huff you joined him on the ground, grabbing his arms and wrapping them around you like a safety belt.

“If I die tonight, I’m blaming you Jung Hoseok.”

He chuckled, inching you both forward until you were at the mouth of the tunnel.

“Ready?” he asked.

“Ready.” you nodded. Suddenly, you were sliding down an endless tunnel. You could hear Hoseok’s joyful laughter over your screams of shock and then as soon as you started, you stopped, your eyes bulging at what you saw.

You were in some sort of crater in the middle of the mountain, because you could see the sky and the stars above you, creating a ceiling for the tall rock that surrounded you. But there was an oasis in the crater. It couldn’t have been more than fifteen feet wide, but around it’s bank there were little sprouts and cactuses growing, and an old blanket laying across the ground.

“Worth it?” Hoseok asked and you could hear the smugness in his voice.

“I don’t know, I think I bruised my butt on the slide down.” you joked, standing and brushing the dirt off your clothes. You moved closer to the oasis, gently running your fingers over the surface of the water; it was warmer than you thought it’d be.

“A lot of frogs breed here, honestly I think it’s the only place the tadpoles can survive in in a twenty mile radius.” Hoseok commented, crouching down next to you.

“How’d you find this place?” you asked.

“Hiking accident,” he winked. “I fell down the tunnel, slipped on some loose rock and ended up here. It was pretty in the day, but at night, you can see everything. C’mon.”

He took you to the blanket, stretching out and laying against it with his hands supporting his head. You laid down next to him, looking up at the amounts of stars shining above you. The moon added a glow to your vision, the entire little room basking a light blue haze around you both. 

“You can see everything. There’s the North star, and the Little Dipper connecting off of it,” Hoseok pointed to the sky and you followed his finger as he named every constellation you could see. You just watched him with love in your eyes; his passion was evident in the way he spoke about the stars and the region and you honestly couldn’t imagine him being anywhere else but here in this small desert town. When his voice grew silent you focused back on him and saw he was staring at you now, just like how you were absentmindedly staring at him. You blushed, chuckling softly but you didn’t look away.

“You were staring.” Hoseok pointed out.

“I know.”

“Are you still infatuated with my good looks?” he teased, turning onto his side to better face you. You turned onto your side too, making the tips of your noises almost touch. 

“Yeah, you wish.” you giggled. Hoseok gave you a half-hearted chuckle in return, his lips falling into a frown.

“I’ve been thinking a lot these past few days.” Hoseok admitted.

“About?”

“About us.” he said easily. “About what we would’ve become if I hadn’t moved. About what we would’ve been if you came out here. About what would’ve happened if we somehow, someway, stayed together.”

“Hoseok…”

“I don’t regret my actions, not at all. But sometimes I wonder what we could’ve been. Haven’t you?”

You squirmed, playing with your hands as you thought. Sure, you’ve missed Hoseok, immensely so. But you never thought about what could’ve been. The thought didn’t cross your mind after building the business and dealing with love in pain and love in patience back-to-back.

“You’re hesitating,” Hoseok chuckled, stopping your fidgeting movements so you could focus entirely on him. “Why?”

“I guess I have some issues when it comes to talking about romantic relationships now.” you chuckled. “I’ve had two complicated relationships with two different people in the past year and a half, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Y/N, it’s just me, I’m not going to get hurt by what you say. Just be honest. Don’t you trust me enough to do that? I feel offended.” Hoseok laughed and you shook your head quickly.

“No! No that’s not it! After these past weeks, I’ve grown to trust you again Hoseok. Completely with all my heart. If I’m being honest…I hadn’t really thought about us and what could’ve been. I was too busy with the business and the past love complications. I’m sorry.” you sighed. Hoseok just smiled, taking your hand in his.

“Thank you for being honest, and I’m not that surprised really. It’s been seven long years of growth for the both of us. I wouldn’t expect you to think about me that way anymore, but a guy can hope sometimes,” Hoseok laughed and the air around you both still seemed light, and for that you were grateful.

“But still, why so hesitant when talking about love? Honesty should always be the forefront, and that shouldn’t make you uneasy.” Hoseok pestered on.

“I guess I don’t trust myself enough to admit my feelings to myself or others for that matter. Really, I just want to know I actually love a person first before I start trusting myself and my emotions with them. Y’know?”

“Oh Y/N,” Hoseok chuckled, his smile lighting up your soul. “Trust is always built first to allow love to grow. I trust you…so much. You’re honest, you’re reliable, and your heart is so open for love and friendship that it makes mine pound. When you say you love someone or something, you show it to your full capacity. I can see it in the way you look at Taehyung, Jimin, Jungkook, and with me. And that’s worth everything to me, even more so that the actual feeling of love. And if I can see that, then everyone else can too. So allow yourself to trust and be honest with the people you care about, because they can see the truth within you too and will appreciate you more for talking about it.” Hoseok spewed, his eyes light and understanding.

You smiled, realizing the true extent of what Hoseok’s words meant. How trust was built for love, and how his trust equated to his love for you. You suddenly brought him in for hug, making him chuckle.

“Aww, Y/N.” Hoseok cooed, hugging you close to him.

“I love you.” you told him, pulling back to see his reaction. Hoseok’s smile just grew and he placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“And I love you.” he giggled. 

“Thank you, for making this trip even more amazing than it already was.” Hoseok waved his hand absentmindedly.

“It was my pleasure. Besides, giving up a moment to hang out with you and Tae again? I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

“It’s just sad we have to leave you behind.” you pouted.

“You’re not, not really. I’ll always be here.” he said, placing his hand on your chest over where your heart was. You smiled, placing your hand over his chest as well.

“And I’ll be here with you too.” Hoseok smiled, placing a light kiss against your lips. 

It wasn’t more than a peck, like how a mother would kiss her child, but it held so much for you. So much love and understanding and light that you allowed Hoseok to do it again, and again. Until the pecks turned into a full kiss, your lips sliding together as you kissed under the lights of the stars. Hoseok pulled you close, holding you like you were the most precious thing in the world to him. His hands gripped your hips, firm and steady to keep you from physically swooning. You giggled when Hoseok bit your lip, pulling away from you with his signature heart-shaped smile. 

“Just like old times, right?” he teased and you giggled, nodding your head.

“Just like old times.”

“Maybe I’ll come out one day and visit. I can’t leave this place though, the desert is my home now.” Hoseok said, the tips of his fingers running over the top hem of your shorts, occasionally brushing the skin of your back. 

“Please? We missed you more than you know.” you chuckled.

“I promise,” he said, placing a parting kiss on your cheeks. “You’re going to make someone feel very loved someday Y/N. And you’re going to get that same love back, tenfold.”

“It’s nice of you to think so.” you laughed, playfully shoving his shoulder. 

“I know so,” he countered, his eyes growing a little wider as he spoke. “My mom always told me this whenever I mentioned love; ‘The people who trust the most, always love the most, therefore, they will always find someone who loves like they do. Because the ones who love the most, deserve someone who can keep up with them and their love for the world.’.” Hoseok paused, allowing his eyes to roam over your face, to stare into your eyes one more time before he let you go. “And honey, you deserve that kind of loving.”


End file.
